Short assessment? What a load of cack!
The Missing Piece of Evidence. OK, run this by me... was Ian in the pub when Louise blurted out to Rebecca that Michelle had hit Dennis? Or was that significant piece of evidence just lost in the shouting and confusion that followed the revelation that Prestonovich had only been using Rebecca, with the collusion of Michelle?
Because when Sharon appeared in Ian's home in this episode, and Ian remarked that Louise had said that Michelle had assaulted her, Sharon immediately defended Louise, saying she wouldn't lie - although Ian was openly sceptical. But no one mentioned anything about Michelle smacking Dennis, and Sharon hasn't yet talked to Louise.
OK, fair enough, assuming Ian doesn't know, Ian and Sharon are still firmly Team Michelle. It's all about getting to the hospital and comforting poor, victim Michelle.
I can't get over Ian's silly remark ...
I mean, Michelle is never gonna go for a fifteen year-old ...
No, Ian, you stupid twerp, But she'll go for a 10 year-old, who's even more of a child. Before anyone even knew of the chippie crash, Louise and Dennis had taken themselves to Ian's house for their own safety. Neither child felt safe with Michelle in the house. I don't know what Ian told Sharon on the phone the evening before or what it was that she wasn't able to comprehend, but in all of this entire episode, Sharon never once asked about her son.
I do hope there's an eventual scene between Sharon, her son and stepdaughter; because i have a feeling that Michelle's last champion standing is going to attempt to bring her back to the Mitchell house. Sharon needs to know that Michelle raised her hand to Sharon's child.
This entire segment of the episode was a concerted effort to redeem Michelle as a victim of Preston's sexual insouciance. She wasn't. She was the adult, and this is sending out a message that is just wrong, wrong, wrong.
I question Sean O'Connor's mores and social values. We've already had him dismiss mental illness by insinuating that anyone suffering from clinical depression needs to be harangued, badgered and demeaned by the people around them, until in the end, the sufferer takes himself away, the driving message being that people with mental health issues need to be sent away, convinced to go of their own volition on the premise promoted that they don't deserve to be around the family, whose standards they've failed to live by.
Already, we're seeing the resolution of the difficulties of dealing with an elderly relative suffering from Alzheimer's - leave them alone with an electrical appliance, an extension lead and a warm bath and watch them go up in smoke. After all, it's only an accident.
And now we have tea and sympathy for a woman who's committed statutory rape. This happened in Florida. Sharon knows Florida; she knows the repercussions of an adult having sex with a teenager of sixteen - and yet, she was sniggling and giggling about Michelle being a cradle-snatcher. I don't care if Preston is being presented as the initiator in all of this sexual malarkey - he was under the age of consent, and Michelle was the adult. The onus lay with her to react responsibly.
Neither Michelle nor Preston are victims here. They're both as scurvy and self-serving as one another. Martin was right - Michelle was caught up in a tissue of lies of her own making, and she involved everyone in her deceit, most notably, her niece. I can forgive Martin for not mentioning that Michelle had struck Dennis - he was too caught up in the maelstrom of shouting and screaming that occurred around the reveal; but someone has to tell Sharon what happened, and I can only surmise that Louise and Dennis will react accordingly and read Sharon a riot act when she tries to bring poor, pitiful 'Chelle back to the Mitchell home to recuperate.
How adversely this will affect Dennis! He's a kid, and he had to endure Michelle taunting him about how Sharon would believe her before she'd believe anything he said, how he could never hope to come between his mother's and Michelle's friendship, implying that Sharon thought more of Michelle than she did her own son. And, tonight, I almost came to believe that, the way yet another skewed duff-duff showed Sharon, lovingly stroking Michelle's brow after having successfully seen off Preston.
She did what Michelle could never accomplish - she bought him a ticket to the States. You'll recall that Michelle had, as Sharon predicted, told him on numerous occasions to leave, to go home, but Preston didn't have money for a ticket, and Michelle didn't have it either, because he kept pestering her to buy his ticket.
And that's another gaping hole in this storyline - the fact that Preston had a one-way ticket. In this day and age, border authorities at airports do more than just look askance at someone entering the country on a one-way ticket. Preston would never be allowed to stay more than six months in one stretch, but he'd have to have that return ticket to show. In an age of terrorism and illegal immigration fears, the first thing security official think decidedly fishy is someone entering a country on a one-way ticket, if he or she doesn't have a passport from that country.
Obviously, the highlight of this segment was Sharon, playing the Mitchell closer and getting Preston to leave the country, even ensuring that Martin bodily takes him to Heathrow and makes certain he gets on the plane. She bent the truth and told Preston some hard lies that were actually masked truths that she saw and that Michelle would never admit. In this instance, she got Daran Little's line of the night:-
Preston (petulantly): All you see is the age gap.
Sharon: It's not a gap, it's a canyon.
Michelle's brief appearance, huddled on her hospital bed, smiling at Sharon, not only marked her as some weak-willed, lonely, yet sneaky and sinister manipulator. She must have been happy that Sharon gave her that loving caress, instead of storming into her hospital room, guns blazing about her having hit Dennis. This now gives her a foothold of leverage over Louise and Dennis, the bitch.
The last two episodes have given us the measure of Preston, as well as allowing us to see how poor the actor was who played him. He's basically a selfish little git, as evidenced by his sense of entitlement being affronted by Martin not bringing a coffee back for him, whilst they waited for news of Michelle.
He was always there, always in someone else's space where he had no right to be, and he's still trying to establish some sort of post-coital approbrium from Rebecca, as if he wants to hold her in abeyance as the contingency plan, should he wake up in ten years' time when he's not even thirty and Michelle is pushing sixty. Does he honestly think she'd be okay with an explanation that he really liked her, but - yeah - he used her to make her auntie jealous.
It struck me that this kid is not just socially gauche, he's a sociopath. He is deeply self-absorbed - the whining line about Martin not bringing a drink back for him just reeked of entitlement - and was only thinking of the continuing relationship with Michelle as being something driven by him for his own benefit. I wish Sharon hadn't used that ubiquitous cliché about this relationship with Michelle being some sort of coming-of-age trophy, but she was able to assess that he was emotionally clingy and suffocating with Michelle. That's giving too much credit to Michelle. He was emotionally manipulative, but she was fucking addicted to him, and she was all over the place.
The only times she ever realised that her association with him was wrong was when it hit her in the face that, because of him and their sexual mesalliance, her professional career is ended, for nothing. She knew being with him wouldn't work, and she should have been able to have found funds - maxed out her credit card even more - and sent his arse packing; but she didn't. He knew exactly how to play her, setting up a relationship with her niece to raise jealousy, even sharing a bed with Rebecca and subsequently, Michelle, on one afternoon.
When she ticked him off and he left for Manchester, by the time he'd returned, she was all over him. Remember her first words, when he came back to the Mitchell house -
Don't you ever go away from me again!
She wanted him, but as her dirty little secret. She knew the price she paid for that association back in Florida - as Sharon pointed out, Michelle hadn't spoken to her son in months ...
Do you know what that does to a mother?
Fuck off, Sharon. Because you're defending a woman who whacked the back of her hand across your young child's face, because he told her an unwelcome home truth about what she was, in his child's eye. Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings and all that.
But Preston is a kid, and he's thinking like a kid. He "loves" Michelle because she's easy sex. He keeps talking about what they "have", yet thinking to keep Rebecca sweet and understanding as a back-up plan. At the end of the day, all it took was Sharon buying him a plane ticket on her credit card.
Shit, he even gave Rebecca his blessing by telling her that maybe she should go back to Shakil, that he wasn't a bad guy. (Did he even know Shakil?) And there you have it, neatly tied up with a nice bow, is the eventual text message from Shakil to Rebecca, asking "U OK"? (Such a man of words, Shakil)
And all is happy in the world now - Rebecca will go back to Shakil. Martin will realise how much better a person the doltish Shakil is, compared to Preston, and Sharon will start a campaign to redeem Michelle, aided and abetted by Ian. Sharon needs to talk to her son and step-daughter.
What a bloody awful and weak end to an atrocious storyllne. In fact, Sharon's last scene with Michelle and Carmel's last scene with Denise made me wonder at all the underlying sapphic codes just bursting at the seams with these heterosexual women - Sharon's tender caress of Michelle's fevered brow (she never did that to Dennis when he was badly hurt in the SUV crash Christmas 2015), and Carmel exclaiming that when she had to take Kush's side in his eventual break-up with Denise, that she would "lose" Denise.
Jesus fucking Christ.
The Diva. Another bloody sitcom featuring the star of the show, Denise, who never seems to be off the screen these days. Even in afterglow, she's patting herself on the back, trilling along about what sexual chemistry she and Kush have.
(Pass the puke bucket, please).
So on the basis of sex, both Denise (who puts high value on sex in a relationship) and Kush (who doesn't think past sex) decide they're the real thing for each other. The eventual scene of Carmel accidentally on purpose almost discovering their little secret was too typical and trite, right down to Denise being forced to hide under the bed.
The fact that Carmel, like Kush, puts emphasis on fucking first as a preliminary to establishing a relationship was evidenced by her assumption that Kush had chatted up a doctor at the hospital and she'd followed him home for a bit of 'owsyerfavva, which - of course -is something no doctor would do anywhere, except EastEndersLand. But the idea was that Carmel knew exactly the way Kush worked and condoned it.
It struck me whilst watching this laboursome segment, how similar it was, in many ways, to the Preston and Michelle fiasco, except that both these people are consenting adults. I also can't help thinking about the variance in what both Kush and Denise hope to attain from this relationship.
The first and foremost purpose of this relationship for Denise is fun. Probably because all her other relationships were so fraught in one way or another. Her other premise is the same old same old "life's too short." In other words, this is her way of having sexual fun before she's too old and her life is ended. Does she realise that in ten years' time, when she's pushing sixty and gravity is making her bits go South, that Kush will still be a young man, whose eye might stray?
Kush, on the other hand, wants fun, but a bit more. Well, we knew he was Oedipal, but if he's hoping he can get back the same thing he had and lost with Shabnam, think again. Don't forget, Denise has a propensity to use and drop younger men - Fatboy - whilst eventually, Kush is going to want a family. Also, don't forget that both of Denise's daughters are nearer Kush's age - especially Chelsea - and I wonder if we're going to see a return of either one or both for their reactions. I wouldn't think they'd be so positive, especially po-faced Libby.
Kush is never going to be a part of Arthur's life, and Zair is dead. This is also an age canyon, although not as deep, and I'm thankful that we didn't get a prolonged period of Denise and Kush sneaking around having surreptitious sex with comic near-discovery scenes from Carmel and Kim. But even the reveal scene, with Kim and Carmel on hand, was painstakingly contrived in the stinking sitcom mould which seems to follow Denise around. This was bum-clinchingly embarrassing, the highlight being the camera resting on Carmel's face as she slowly realises that Denise and Kush are a couple. Bonnie Langford played that to perfection without uttering a word - plus, I loved her cynical assessment of what is basically a relationship based on sex, but sex sought for the wrong reasons for each of these people. Denise wants fun, on-tap sex from a fit bloke - because "life's too short" and this life is now all about Denise; and Kush, all of whose relationships had begun with sex, I think is still in mourning for Zair, and feeling sorry for himself for losing Shabnam. He's looking for another Shabnam, and possibly, another Zair - but he won't find that with Denise.
Say whatever you will about Carmel, another character whom I dislike (and there are so many now in EastEnders), but she is one mother who knows her sons, like the back of her hand. She knows that this is a relationship that's bound to end in tears, but Daran Little copped out on her final assessment - that being that,when the shit hit the fan, and the two split, she'd be forced to take sides in the break-up and she'd have to side with him .. and then, she said to Denise ...
And then, I'll lose you.
You what? One would be forgiven for thinking Carmel was in love with Denise, herself.
Well, since Daran Little scored an epic fail with that, let me give Carmel the words she should have spoken, which Bonnie Langford would deliver so well ...
Because I know this will all end in tears, and it'll be me who'll pick up the pieces for him. Again. Just like after his first wife died. Just like after he lost Zair and Shabnam left him. Just like I know how it hurts him watching another man bring up his child. My boy wants to settle down with a good wife and someone who'll give him children to make up for the ones he lost. Can you give him that? He should be running around with girls your daughters' ages, not someone old enough to be his mum! He's got me for that! And as for you, you go from the frying pan into the fire,with your choice of men. You're supposed to be my mate!
What are these people thinking who write this?
The Ditz. Once again, Luisa Bradshaw-White stole the show. For once in her life, Tina genuinely feels bereft and alone. She's lost Sylvie, Shirley is in prison, and Mick is away, not that he interacted much within her dynamic with Sylvie. It was funny to see her, inadvertantly, reject Whitney's offer to stay with her, as Whitney tries to lord it out as Queen Bee of the Queen Vic.
There were a couple of good moments in this segment - when they found the congratulatory card sent to Stan and Sylvie on Tina's birth and when Tina rejected the idea of telling Shirley face to face. Quite rightly, Tina stated that Shirley never cared for Sylvie, in fact none of them did, and she said so, until Johnnie protested. He was right. Along with Tina, it was always Johnnie who sat with her, talked with her, listened to her stories.That was true, but then Whitney had to horn in and try to say she did as well.
But she did have a good scene with Tina, in the kitchen of the Vic, when she said she genuinely envied Tina's time with Sylvie; for all she had abandoned Tina, they had two good years, mostly of fun fraught with frustration. With Sonia gone and Sylvie dead, Tina's feeling orphaned and alone.
Luisa Bradshaw-White has come into her own in this storyline. I hope they don't regress her character by pairing her up with Sonia's amazing tits when she returns.
Mostly, this was a pedestrian episode. Is EastEnders anything else these days?
The Missing Piece of Evidence. OK, run this by me... was Ian in the pub when Louise blurted out to Rebecca that Michelle had hit Dennis? Or was that significant piece of evidence just lost in the shouting and confusion that followed the revelation that Prestonovich had only been using Rebecca, with the collusion of Michelle?
Because when Sharon appeared in Ian's home in this episode, and Ian remarked that Louise had said that Michelle had assaulted her, Sharon immediately defended Louise, saying she wouldn't lie - although Ian was openly sceptical. But no one mentioned anything about Michelle smacking Dennis, and Sharon hasn't yet talked to Louise.
OK, fair enough, assuming Ian doesn't know, Ian and Sharon are still firmly Team Michelle. It's all about getting to the hospital and comforting poor, victim Michelle.
I can't get over Ian's silly remark ...
I mean, Michelle is never gonna go for a fifteen year-old ...
No, Ian, you stupid twerp, But she'll go for a 10 year-old, who's even more of a child. Before anyone even knew of the chippie crash, Louise and Dennis had taken themselves to Ian's house for their own safety. Neither child felt safe with Michelle in the house. I don't know what Ian told Sharon on the phone the evening before or what it was that she wasn't able to comprehend, but in all of this entire episode, Sharon never once asked about her son.
I do hope there's an eventual scene between Sharon, her son and stepdaughter; because i have a feeling that Michelle's last champion standing is going to attempt to bring her back to the Mitchell house. Sharon needs to know that Michelle raised her hand to Sharon's child.
This entire segment of the episode was a concerted effort to redeem Michelle as a victim of Preston's sexual insouciance. She wasn't. She was the adult, and this is sending out a message that is just wrong, wrong, wrong.
I question Sean O'Connor's mores and social values. We've already had him dismiss mental illness by insinuating that anyone suffering from clinical depression needs to be harangued, badgered and demeaned by the people around them, until in the end, the sufferer takes himself away, the driving message being that people with mental health issues need to be sent away, convinced to go of their own volition on the premise promoted that they don't deserve to be around the family, whose standards they've failed to live by.
Already, we're seeing the resolution of the difficulties of dealing with an elderly relative suffering from Alzheimer's - leave them alone with an electrical appliance, an extension lead and a warm bath and watch them go up in smoke. After all, it's only an accident.
And now we have tea and sympathy for a woman who's committed statutory rape. This happened in Florida. Sharon knows Florida; she knows the repercussions of an adult having sex with a teenager of sixteen - and yet, she was sniggling and giggling about Michelle being a cradle-snatcher. I don't care if Preston is being presented as the initiator in all of this sexual malarkey - he was under the age of consent, and Michelle was the adult. The onus lay with her to react responsibly.
Neither Michelle nor Preston are victims here. They're both as scurvy and self-serving as one another. Martin was right - Michelle was caught up in a tissue of lies of her own making, and she involved everyone in her deceit, most notably, her niece. I can forgive Martin for not mentioning that Michelle had struck Dennis - he was too caught up in the maelstrom of shouting and screaming that occurred around the reveal; but someone has to tell Sharon what happened, and I can only surmise that Louise and Dennis will react accordingly and read Sharon a riot act when she tries to bring poor, pitiful 'Chelle back to the Mitchell home to recuperate.
How adversely this will affect Dennis! He's a kid, and he had to endure Michelle taunting him about how Sharon would believe her before she'd believe anything he said, how he could never hope to come between his mother's and Michelle's friendship, implying that Sharon thought more of Michelle than she did her own son. And, tonight, I almost came to believe that, the way yet another skewed duff-duff showed Sharon, lovingly stroking Michelle's brow after having successfully seen off Preston.
She did what Michelle could never accomplish - she bought him a ticket to the States. You'll recall that Michelle had, as Sharon predicted, told him on numerous occasions to leave, to go home, but Preston didn't have money for a ticket, and Michelle didn't have it either, because he kept pestering her to buy his ticket.
And that's another gaping hole in this storyline - the fact that Preston had a one-way ticket. In this day and age, border authorities at airports do more than just look askance at someone entering the country on a one-way ticket. Preston would never be allowed to stay more than six months in one stretch, but he'd have to have that return ticket to show. In an age of terrorism and illegal immigration fears, the first thing security official think decidedly fishy is someone entering a country on a one-way ticket, if he or she doesn't have a passport from that country.
Obviously, the highlight of this segment was Sharon, playing the Mitchell closer and getting Preston to leave the country, even ensuring that Martin bodily takes him to Heathrow and makes certain he gets on the plane. She bent the truth and told Preston some hard lies that were actually masked truths that she saw and that Michelle would never admit. In this instance, she got Daran Little's line of the night:-
Preston (petulantly): All you see is the age gap.
Sharon: It's not a gap, it's a canyon.
Michelle's brief appearance, huddled on her hospital bed, smiling at Sharon, not only marked her as some weak-willed, lonely, yet sneaky and sinister manipulator. She must have been happy that Sharon gave her that loving caress, instead of storming into her hospital room, guns blazing about her having hit Dennis. This now gives her a foothold of leverage over Louise and Dennis, the bitch.
The last two episodes have given us the measure of Preston, as well as allowing us to see how poor the actor was who played him. He's basically a selfish little git, as evidenced by his sense of entitlement being affronted by Martin not bringing a coffee back for him, whilst they waited for news of Michelle.
He was always there, always in someone else's space where he had no right to be, and he's still trying to establish some sort of post-coital approbrium from Rebecca, as if he wants to hold her in abeyance as the contingency plan, should he wake up in ten years' time when he's not even thirty and Michelle is pushing sixty. Does he honestly think she'd be okay with an explanation that he really liked her, but - yeah - he used her to make her auntie jealous.
It struck me that this kid is not just socially gauche, he's a sociopath. He is deeply self-absorbed - the whining line about Martin not bringing a drink back for him just reeked of entitlement - and was only thinking of the continuing relationship with Michelle as being something driven by him for his own benefit. I wish Sharon hadn't used that ubiquitous cliché about this relationship with Michelle being some sort of coming-of-age trophy, but she was able to assess that he was emotionally clingy and suffocating with Michelle. That's giving too much credit to Michelle. He was emotionally manipulative, but she was fucking addicted to him, and she was all over the place.
The only times she ever realised that her association with him was wrong was when it hit her in the face that, because of him and their sexual mesalliance, her professional career is ended, for nothing. She knew being with him wouldn't work, and she should have been able to have found funds - maxed out her credit card even more - and sent his arse packing; but she didn't. He knew exactly how to play her, setting up a relationship with her niece to raise jealousy, even sharing a bed with Rebecca and subsequently, Michelle, on one afternoon.
When she ticked him off and he left for Manchester, by the time he'd returned, she was all over him. Remember her first words, when he came back to the Mitchell house -
Don't you ever go away from me again!
She wanted him, but as her dirty little secret. She knew the price she paid for that association back in Florida - as Sharon pointed out, Michelle hadn't spoken to her son in months ...
Do you know what that does to a mother?
Fuck off, Sharon. Because you're defending a woman who whacked the back of her hand across your young child's face, because he told her an unwelcome home truth about what she was, in his child's eye. Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings and all that.
But Preston is a kid, and he's thinking like a kid. He "loves" Michelle because she's easy sex. He keeps talking about what they "have", yet thinking to keep Rebecca sweet and understanding as a back-up plan. At the end of the day, all it took was Sharon buying him a plane ticket on her credit card.
Shit, he even gave Rebecca his blessing by telling her that maybe she should go back to Shakil, that he wasn't a bad guy. (Did he even know Shakil?) And there you have it, neatly tied up with a nice bow, is the eventual text message from Shakil to Rebecca, asking "U OK"? (Such a man of words, Shakil)
And all is happy in the world now - Rebecca will go back to Shakil. Martin will realise how much better a person the doltish Shakil is, compared to Preston, and Sharon will start a campaign to redeem Michelle, aided and abetted by Ian. Sharon needs to talk to her son and step-daughter.
What a bloody awful and weak end to an atrocious storyllne. In fact, Sharon's last scene with Michelle and Carmel's last scene with Denise made me wonder at all the underlying sapphic codes just bursting at the seams with these heterosexual women - Sharon's tender caress of Michelle's fevered brow (she never did that to Dennis when he was badly hurt in the SUV crash Christmas 2015), and Carmel exclaiming that when she had to take Kush's side in his eventual break-up with Denise, that she would "lose" Denise.
Jesus fucking Christ.
The Diva. Another bloody sitcom featuring the star of the show, Denise, who never seems to be off the screen these days. Even in afterglow, she's patting herself on the back, trilling along about what sexual chemistry she and Kush have.
(Pass the puke bucket, please).
So on the basis of sex, both Denise (who puts high value on sex in a relationship) and Kush (who doesn't think past sex) decide they're the real thing for each other. The eventual scene of Carmel accidentally on purpose almost discovering their little secret was too typical and trite, right down to Denise being forced to hide under the bed.
The fact that Carmel, like Kush, puts emphasis on fucking first as a preliminary to establishing a relationship was evidenced by her assumption that Kush had chatted up a doctor at the hospital and she'd followed him home for a bit of 'owsyerfavva, which - of course -is something no doctor would do anywhere, except EastEndersLand. But the idea was that Carmel knew exactly the way Kush worked and condoned it.
It struck me whilst watching this laboursome segment, how similar it was, in many ways, to the Preston and Michelle fiasco, except that both these people are consenting adults. I also can't help thinking about the variance in what both Kush and Denise hope to attain from this relationship.
The first and foremost purpose of this relationship for Denise is fun. Probably because all her other relationships were so fraught in one way or another. Her other premise is the same old same old "life's too short." In other words, this is her way of having sexual fun before she's too old and her life is ended. Does she realise that in ten years' time, when she's pushing sixty and gravity is making her bits go South, that Kush will still be a young man, whose eye might stray?
Kush, on the other hand, wants fun, but a bit more. Well, we knew he was Oedipal, but if he's hoping he can get back the same thing he had and lost with Shabnam, think again. Don't forget, Denise has a propensity to use and drop younger men - Fatboy - whilst eventually, Kush is going to want a family. Also, don't forget that both of Denise's daughters are nearer Kush's age - especially Chelsea - and I wonder if we're going to see a return of either one or both for their reactions. I wouldn't think they'd be so positive, especially po-faced Libby.
Kush is never going to be a part of Arthur's life, and Zair is dead. This is also an age canyon, although not as deep, and I'm thankful that we didn't get a prolonged period of Denise and Kush sneaking around having surreptitious sex with comic near-discovery scenes from Carmel and Kim. But even the reveal scene, with Kim and Carmel on hand, was painstakingly contrived in the stinking sitcom mould which seems to follow Denise around. This was bum-clinchingly embarrassing, the highlight being the camera resting on Carmel's face as she slowly realises that Denise and Kush are a couple. Bonnie Langford played that to perfection without uttering a word - plus, I loved her cynical assessment of what is basically a relationship based on sex, but sex sought for the wrong reasons for each of these people. Denise wants fun, on-tap sex from a fit bloke - because "life's too short" and this life is now all about Denise; and Kush, all of whose relationships had begun with sex, I think is still in mourning for Zair, and feeling sorry for himself for losing Shabnam. He's looking for another Shabnam, and possibly, another Zair - but he won't find that with Denise.
Say whatever you will about Carmel, another character whom I dislike (and there are so many now in EastEnders), but she is one mother who knows her sons, like the back of her hand. She knows that this is a relationship that's bound to end in tears, but Daran Little copped out on her final assessment - that being that,when the shit hit the fan, and the two split, she'd be forced to take sides in the break-up and she'd have to side with him .. and then, she said to Denise ...
And then, I'll lose you.
You what? One would be forgiven for thinking Carmel was in love with Denise, herself.
Well, since Daran Little scored an epic fail with that, let me give Carmel the words she should have spoken, which Bonnie Langford would deliver so well ...
Because I know this will all end in tears, and it'll be me who'll pick up the pieces for him. Again. Just like after his first wife died. Just like after he lost Zair and Shabnam left him. Just like I know how it hurts him watching another man bring up his child. My boy wants to settle down with a good wife and someone who'll give him children to make up for the ones he lost. Can you give him that? He should be running around with girls your daughters' ages, not someone old enough to be his mum! He's got me for that! And as for you, you go from the frying pan into the fire,with your choice of men. You're supposed to be my mate!
What are these people thinking who write this?
The Ditz. Once again, Luisa Bradshaw-White stole the show. For once in her life, Tina genuinely feels bereft and alone. She's lost Sylvie, Shirley is in prison, and Mick is away, not that he interacted much within her dynamic with Sylvie. It was funny to see her, inadvertantly, reject Whitney's offer to stay with her, as Whitney tries to lord it out as Queen Bee of the Queen Vic.
There were a couple of good moments in this segment - when they found the congratulatory card sent to Stan and Sylvie on Tina's birth and when Tina rejected the idea of telling Shirley face to face. Quite rightly, Tina stated that Shirley never cared for Sylvie, in fact none of them did, and she said so, until Johnnie protested. He was right. Along with Tina, it was always Johnnie who sat with her, talked with her, listened to her stories.That was true, but then Whitney had to horn in and try to say she did as well.
But she did have a good scene with Tina, in the kitchen of the Vic, when she said she genuinely envied Tina's time with Sylvie; for all she had abandoned Tina, they had two good years, mostly of fun fraught with frustration. With Sonia gone and Sylvie dead, Tina's feeling orphaned and alone.
Luisa Bradshaw-White has come into her own in this storyline. I hope they don't regress her character by pairing her up with Sonia's amazing tits when she returns.
Mostly, this was a pedestrian episode. Is EastEnders anything else these days?
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