For all the fanbois creaming their knickers in the Ratings' thread on a particular forum, cop this:-
Stacey's return has done nothing for the show thus far.
Yes, yes, I know, the ratings are up and have been up since the Messiah has returned ...
... but they are still behing Coronation Street, and they still haven't managed to crack the magic 8 million mark, which eludes them consistently. In short, like Ronnie's return, most potential viewers and returnee viewers didn't bat an eyelid.
It was ... meh.
So let's cut to the chase with, apart from one unbelieveably impossible storyline, what was essentially yet another filler episode.
The Queen of Mean vs Two Rank Skanks.
So now we know that Stacey has, not only a false passport, but a false National Insurance number as well. Since she left the UK on Christmas Day 2010, she probably obtained the forged passport from some shady character on a backstreet in Mexico, the way Sam Mitchell obtained hes in Rio, except poor Stacey probably had to pay for her in instalments of some sort - nudge nudge wink wink. How she got the NI number upon her return is anyone's guess, but got it she did, for the prescription for her bi-polar medication is in the name of Jenny SMIF.
And, of course, it seems that Stacey hasn't been taking her medication, which Alfie discovers. That's no surprise either, because Stacey is so super-cool and entitled, she really doesn't have to take her medication. She can take care of herself. Not.
Besides, an immediate bi-polar episode would help in swaying us recalcitrant, down-right ornery viewers who don't see Stacey the way her number one, one-brain-celled fan dancing.queen does, (Quite honestly, if I ever began to think the same way as that bimbo thinks, I'd volunteer for sectioning) absolutely love her skanky arse.
That doesn't matter either, as it seems Alfie is the only adult in the room regarding Stacey, as Kat and Stacey, bold as brass, have gone to visit Janine. So entitled are these two dumb bitches that they actually think Janine will do as they wish and drop all charges against Stacey.
Just who do they think Janine is?
I'll tell you this way - Janine is a bitch and she owns it. She accepts responsibility for what she's done, even though she'll never admit openly what she's done, espicially if it means separation from her daughter, but make no mistake - Charlie Brooks made that entire episode, and watching her only made one realise just how sorely Janine will be missed, in comparison to the piss poor loud-mouthed mares who remain in her wake.
Brooks played a blinder, a masteclass of icy control and measured vocal tones, in contrast to the perpetual yet annoying sad-eyed "pity-me" furrowed frown and flared nostrils of Lacey Turner, who looked like a sow about to be shot between the eyes and the scratchy tones of Jessie Wallace, whose character reckoned for one brief moment that she could get the better of Janine.
A couple of observations - Stacey kept wittering about "getting life" if she went to prison, and I'm not certain about what she meant, because Stacey is only wanted for stabbing Janine (as well as absconding the country and re-entering on a false passport and having false National Insurance details on which she has received drugs). Hmmmm .... maybe life isn't so far off being wrong.
And Janine had the brass balls to mention someone whom everyone else has studiously avoided until this time - Archie Mitchell.
Janine knows that Stacey killed Archie and she drives his death home to her with a sledge hammer, brushing aside Kat's lame assertion that Bradley killed Archie with the contempt it deserved. Throughout that scene at the prison, which was constantly being interrupted to cut back to other, less interesting vignettes, the power of Charlie Brooks's presence carried the storyline and proved how she stands head and shoulder above the one trick ponies that are Turner and Wallace.
In the end, Janine drives a hard bargain. She'll drop charges against Stacey, but only after Kat has told the police that she saw Alice kill Michael. So with one fell swoop, Kat is left with the decision to throw the cousin of her friend under a bus or let her own cousin, who's actually a real murderer, go on the run again.
Nice one, Janine.
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?
Well, it's not Dean, for certain, in what is set to be yet another long lead-in to the return of a character who was sacked almost six years ago and branded as ridiculous. Now that he's matured into a fine young actor elsewhere, EgoBoy is going to take credit for bringing Dean Wicks back to Walford and back to Mummy's hard-face.
I predict that he'll be back for two episodes before we get the ubiquitous shirless scene, which seem to be as much for DTC's benefit as for the screaming horde of teenaged girls to whom he purports to pander. Since his return to the helm, we've had Peter Beale strip off in the market in December, a couple of up-close-and-personal shots of Danny Dyer's tackle, Dexter stripped to his remarkably scarless torso (considering he donated a kidney in the autumn) in the cellar of the Vic, and Aleks draped in a towel, prowling the B and B. The time is rife for Dean to strip off, shortly after arriving.
No doubt, we'll get constant reminders that Dean is on his way, four times weekly until he finally appears at the end of this month. Or is it next month? Ne'mind. He's on his way, because Shirley's cleaning the joint.
Instead of Dean, we got Tosh, the firefighting ex-girlfriend of Tina, whom I'm increasingly beginning to believe is borderline retarded, because something got left someplace in childhood. I used to think Shirley was depressing as mutton dressed as lamb (a titled since inherited by Linda), but Tina takes insipidity to a new level with her silly leggins, Court Jester attire and hair tied in bunches.
Subtle moment of the episode was watching Linda's homophobic disapproval melt away as Tosh regaled her with tales of Broadway and musicals after having made a trip to New York.
But there they go, Mick and Shirley, wittering on about Shirley "rescuing" Mick and Tina from care and "raising" them. Mick is supposedly thirty-eight and Tina thirty-nine. Shirley is fifty-one - thirteen years older than Mick and twelve years older than Tina. They were babies when taken into care, and Shirley was a young adolescent. By the time she was eighteen, she was married to Kevin and expecting James.
Please get your fucking continuity right - when Shirley was allegedly "raising" Mick and Tina, she was Kevin's wife and the mother of three small children, whom she abandoned. And she didn't abandon them to raise her siblings either. Not all viewers are as clueless as the bullybois and fangirls found on the fora,
And Speaking of Bullies ...
Having cancer doesn't give you the right to behave inappropriately. Just who does Carol think she is, passive-aggressively bullying Tamwar into visiting or writing to Alice?
Is Carol stupid or does she not realise that Alice treated Tamwar like a piece of shit, belittling him and rejecting him for Michael Moon? Tamwar owes her nothing, least of all the skin off his arse. Alice is a big girl, and let's stop with the "poor innocent girl" shit. She was sleeping with a married man and plotting to kill his wife and aid him in kidnapping his daughter. Alice is in deep shit, and she's the second Branning vestal virgin to become a homewrecker before she hit twenty.
Tamwar should have told Carol to do one, but now that Masood has interfered on his behalf, he'll end up capitulating.
Patrick Deserves Better.
He certainly doesn't deserve to be alone, but Denise had no right to dictate to Ian that his ten year-old son could move in with his twenty year-old sister so Patrick could move in with the Beales.
Conversely, Patrick shouldn't be that desperate that he offers Cora the Bora and her infinitely unlikeable grandson rented accommodation, which Cora thought was a euphemism for OAP sex. Patrick was right to recoil - who wouldn't upchuck at the sight and smell of that old trout lunging at you, functioning alcoholic that she is.
And it's about time too, that Max chucked the freeloaders out. I'm guessing Cora, the eternal uninvited guest, pays no rent, andBlack Bradley Dexter, who assumed he had a given place in the establishment, pays next to nothing. I'm also guessing the state of the kitchen was down to that shitbreathed little toerag, who's now gone from "Mum man" to "Nan man."
How offensive a racial stereotype is Dexter, conceived and constructed by lilywhite, middle-class fanbois who'd run a mile and shit a brick at the prospect of any real encounter with a Dexter.
The sooner that little prick leaves, the better. And the sooner more people start realising that DTC really isn't that much better than Newman at her worst, the sooner he might pull his finger out and give us some gritty, realistic storylines ... Oops, there'sStacey a pig flying.
Stacey's return has done nothing for the show thus far.
Yes, yes, I know, the ratings are up and have been up since the Messiah has returned ...
... but they are still behing Coronation Street, and they still haven't managed to crack the magic 8 million mark, which eludes them consistently. In short, like Ronnie's return, most potential viewers and returnee viewers didn't bat an eyelid.
It was ... meh.
So let's cut to the chase with, apart from one unbelieveably impossible storyline, what was essentially yet another filler episode.
The Queen of Mean vs Two Rank Skanks.
So now we know that Stacey has, not only a false passport, but a false National Insurance number as well. Since she left the UK on Christmas Day 2010, she probably obtained the forged passport from some shady character on a backstreet in Mexico, the way Sam Mitchell obtained hes in Rio, except poor Stacey probably had to pay for her in instalments of some sort - nudge nudge wink wink. How she got the NI number upon her return is anyone's guess, but got it she did, for the prescription for her bi-polar medication is in the name of Jenny SMIF.
And, of course, it seems that Stacey hasn't been taking her medication, which Alfie discovers. That's no surprise either, because Stacey is so super-cool and entitled, she really doesn't have to take her medication. She can take care of herself. Not.
Besides, an immediate bi-polar episode would help in swaying us recalcitrant, down-right ornery viewers who don't see Stacey the way her number one, one-brain-celled fan dancing.queen does, (Quite honestly, if I ever began to think the same way as that bimbo thinks, I'd volunteer for sectioning) absolutely love her skanky arse.
That doesn't matter either, as it seems Alfie is the only adult in the room regarding Stacey, as Kat and Stacey, bold as brass, have gone to visit Janine. So entitled are these two dumb bitches that they actually think Janine will do as they wish and drop all charges against Stacey.
Just who do they think Janine is?
I'll tell you this way - Janine is a bitch and she owns it. She accepts responsibility for what she's done, even though she'll never admit openly what she's done, espicially if it means separation from her daughter, but make no mistake - Charlie Brooks made that entire episode, and watching her only made one realise just how sorely Janine will be missed, in comparison to the piss poor loud-mouthed mares who remain in her wake.
Brooks played a blinder, a masteclass of icy control and measured vocal tones, in contrast to the perpetual yet annoying sad-eyed "pity-me" furrowed frown and flared nostrils of Lacey Turner, who looked like a sow about to be shot between the eyes and the scratchy tones of Jessie Wallace, whose character reckoned for one brief moment that she could get the better of Janine.
A couple of observations - Stacey kept wittering about "getting life" if she went to prison, and I'm not certain about what she meant, because Stacey is only wanted for stabbing Janine (as well as absconding the country and re-entering on a false passport and having false National Insurance details on which she has received drugs). Hmmmm .... maybe life isn't so far off being wrong.
And Janine had the brass balls to mention someone whom everyone else has studiously avoided until this time - Archie Mitchell.
Janine knows that Stacey killed Archie and she drives his death home to her with a sledge hammer, brushing aside Kat's lame assertion that Bradley killed Archie with the contempt it deserved. Throughout that scene at the prison, which was constantly being interrupted to cut back to other, less interesting vignettes, the power of Charlie Brooks's presence carried the storyline and proved how she stands head and shoulder above the one trick ponies that are Turner and Wallace.
In the end, Janine drives a hard bargain. She'll drop charges against Stacey, but only after Kat has told the police that she saw Alice kill Michael. So with one fell swoop, Kat is left with the decision to throw the cousin of her friend under a bus or let her own cousin, who's actually a real murderer, go on the run again.
Nice one, Janine.
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?
Well, it's not Dean, for certain, in what is set to be yet another long lead-in to the return of a character who was sacked almost six years ago and branded as ridiculous. Now that he's matured into a fine young actor elsewhere, EgoBoy is going to take credit for bringing Dean Wicks back to Walford and back to Mummy's hard-face.
I predict that he'll be back for two episodes before we get the ubiquitous shirless scene, which seem to be as much for DTC's benefit as for the screaming horde of teenaged girls to whom he purports to pander. Since his return to the helm, we've had Peter Beale strip off in the market in December, a couple of up-close-and-personal shots of Danny Dyer's tackle, Dexter stripped to his remarkably scarless torso (considering he donated a kidney in the autumn) in the cellar of the Vic, and Aleks draped in a towel, prowling the B and B. The time is rife for Dean to strip off, shortly after arriving.
No doubt, we'll get constant reminders that Dean is on his way, four times weekly until he finally appears at the end of this month. Or is it next month? Ne'mind. He's on his way, because Shirley's cleaning the joint.
Instead of Dean, we got Tosh, the firefighting ex-girlfriend of Tina, whom I'm increasingly beginning to believe is borderline retarded, because something got left someplace in childhood. I used to think Shirley was depressing as mutton dressed as lamb (a titled since inherited by Linda), but Tina takes insipidity to a new level with her silly leggins, Court Jester attire and hair tied in bunches.
Subtle moment of the episode was watching Linda's homophobic disapproval melt away as Tosh regaled her with tales of Broadway and musicals after having made a trip to New York.
But there they go, Mick and Shirley, wittering on about Shirley "rescuing" Mick and Tina from care and "raising" them. Mick is supposedly thirty-eight and Tina thirty-nine. Shirley is fifty-one - thirteen years older than Mick and twelve years older than Tina. They were babies when taken into care, and Shirley was a young adolescent. By the time she was eighteen, she was married to Kevin and expecting James.
Please get your fucking continuity right - when Shirley was allegedly "raising" Mick and Tina, she was Kevin's wife and the mother of three small children, whom she abandoned. And she didn't abandon them to raise her siblings either. Not all viewers are as clueless as the bullybois and fangirls found on the fora,
And Speaking of Bullies ...
Having cancer doesn't give you the right to behave inappropriately. Just who does Carol think she is, passive-aggressively bullying Tamwar into visiting or writing to Alice?
Is Carol stupid or does she not realise that Alice treated Tamwar like a piece of shit, belittling him and rejecting him for Michael Moon? Tamwar owes her nothing, least of all the skin off his arse. Alice is a big girl, and let's stop with the "poor innocent girl" shit. She was sleeping with a married man and plotting to kill his wife and aid him in kidnapping his daughter. Alice is in deep shit, and she's the second Branning vestal virgin to become a homewrecker before she hit twenty.
Tamwar should have told Carol to do one, but now that Masood has interfered on his behalf, he'll end up capitulating.
Patrick Deserves Better.
He certainly doesn't deserve to be alone, but Denise had no right to dictate to Ian that his ten year-old son could move in with his twenty year-old sister so Patrick could move in with the Beales.
Conversely, Patrick shouldn't be that desperate that he offers Cora the Bora and her infinitely unlikeable grandson rented accommodation, which Cora thought was a euphemism for OAP sex. Patrick was right to recoil - who wouldn't upchuck at the sight and smell of that old trout lunging at you, functioning alcoholic that she is.
And it's about time too, that Max chucked the freeloaders out. I'm guessing Cora, the eternal uninvited guest, pays no rent, and
How offensive a racial stereotype is Dexter, conceived and constructed by lilywhite, middle-class fanbois who'd run a mile and shit a brick at the prospect of any real encounter with a Dexter.
The sooner that little prick leaves, the better. And the sooner more people start realising that DTC really isn't that much better than Newman at her worst, the sooner he might pull his finger out and give us some gritty, realistic storylines ... Oops, there's
The thing that made me laugh in this episode was when fatKat exclaimed in the prison in response to something Janine said
ReplyDelete"we ain't gotta listen to this"
er actually yes you do, as you & Stacey went cap in hand begging for Janine to do you a favor... Bitch.