There were so many of them - Sonia, Tina, Cindy, Pam ... the list goes on. Oh, dear ... I forgot the most slappable face of all ... Jane.
Apart from the return of the Beales, including the murderer and his accomplice, this episode had nothing to offer.
Slappable Faces: The Sitting in Judgement Part.
Martin was right: Sonia didn't deny having an affair with Tina, because that's exactly what she was doing the entire time she was in Walford, ostensibly for Carol's illness - sneaking about, getting drunk and snogging Tina.
What's amazing about all of this is Carol's non-reaction. Fair enough, the sexuality of your child isn't important as long as your child is happy in his or her skin; but Carol should have been concerned at what Sonia was up to behind Martin's back. In the scene where Carol and Martin talked, sitting on Arthur's bench, Carol was quick to point out all of Martin's faults, including his affair, without so much as alluding to anything that could have been Sonia's fault.
Sonia was unfaithful to Martin way long before Martin was unfaithful to her. Remember Naomi? (I see Sonia's finally discovered how to pronounce her name, after repeatedly referring to her as "Gnomi" back in 2006.) Sonia walked away from Martin and Rebecca on that instance, and - as Martin admitted tonight - Pauline was right all along about Sonia.
There was more trash-mouthing of Martin tonight.
Do you think HE's told Rebecca?
HE'd better not have told Rebecca or HE'll answer to me. (Really, Tina? Who the hell are you?)
I've got to get back there before HE tells her.
He, he, he ... spoken with the certainty that Martin was nothing less than a monster. He, himself, described himself in simple terms - he's just a man who wanted a wife and the sort of life and family his parents had; instead, he saw himself as being so boring he turned his wife lesbian.
If we're also going for infidelity on Sonia's part, since she's returned to Walford, she's done no less than try to snog Kush, and she's slept with Fatboy. Compared to Sonia, Martin's been an angel.
Sonia's the biggest kind of coward, and she's all over the place at the moment. She emotionally blackmailed Rebecca into giving up music school, promising the girl that her presence would mean the success of her parents' marriage; the next thing she's doing is trying to move in on Kush and sleeping with Fatboy, all the while buzzing around Tina.
Then there's the question of Tina, herself. Tina's never put anyone's needs before her own, including those of her own daughter, who won't touch her with a barge pole for fear of getting some bad disease, like the clap or something; so she's less than understanding about Sonia wanting to put her daughter's concerns before her own. The truth of the matter is that Sonia is still the biggest sort of coward in coming out of the closet. Still, lesbian or not, when she eventually begs the Court Jester for crumbs from her table, she should take heed of one thing - Tina is one of the last women on that Square with whom I'd want my child associated. She's feckless, dishonest, amoral, a liar, a cheater and a thief. When Tina and Sonia first got together, not only was Sonia still married to Martin, but Tina was in a relationship with Tosh. If Tina will cheat on one partner, she'll cheat on another.
Sonia is one of the most judgemental, self-righteous and annoying characters on the show, played by a woefully inept actress. Natalie Cassidy's emotive acting comes across with a face which looks as though she's in the continuous throes of constipation. She's bad on her own, she's vile with Tina. Tina's selfishness is as bad as Sonia, but in a different way. It meant nothing to her that Sonia's revelation of her new relationship just might have repercussions for her daughter. Tina simply kept screwing up her petulant faux-childlike face and repeating ~But you said but you said but you said ~.
Tina and Sonia deserve each other, and they should leave Walford together and forever.
I know many people are having a hard time adjusting to James Bye as Martin Fowler, but I felt he came into his own tonight, as the last bastion of an established family who finds himself terribly alone. One of the most poignant and sad scenes was at the end of the programme, with Sonia's blithe assessment that Martin would "be all right," not knowing that he's lost his business and the family home.
Think back to about the middle of last year, when Sonia mentioned to Carol that she and Martin were having mortgage troubles. This was right about the time she got suspended for having too much time off work. I would imagine Sonia's wage was much higher than Martin's, and with her leaving home, it never occurred to her to continue to pay her share of the mortgage in order to provide a secure home for her daughter. Or even to contribute to her support.
I'm not surprised, however, that Martin's become yet another loser of a weak Walford male with the man-haters in the writing room.
Slappable Facer: The Irony of the Moment.
Oh, my godfathers! An evening of girl talk and gossip and a bit of Donna's backstory, courtesy of Claudette and nosy Pam. Easily ascertained that Pam was the social worker who placed Donna with foster mother Claudette, and - Pam being Pam - she stuck around and maintained contact enough so that Les could get a whiff of Claudette. And the rest, they say, is history.
So we know now that Donna has "brothers", that she's desperate for a man, just like most of the other single females in Walford. Gotta have that man or else life isn't worth it. But between the two older women, they translated Donna's story - which Donna, rightly, said was no story at all - into two men - pardon, boys - fighting over Donna.
In the end, when Fatboy came around with Donna's present, she took it and ungratefully told him to leave.
There were a couple of moments of irony in that piece, which were supposed to make us do a bit of the nudge-nudge-wink-wink - Pam admiring Claudette's necklace, which Claudette said she'd had a long time; the cosy walk back to the Cokers' flat, arm and arm, when Pam casually remarks that Les was just mentioning Claudette the other day.
This is supposed to be clever?
It isn't, mostly because I don't give two hoots about Pam or Claudette's fanagling with Les behind her back, or really, Donna, whom we know really likes Fatboy, no matter how much she might turn her nose up at the naff gift he gave her.
That entire vignette was to set up a bit of Donna's backstory, and to juxtapose Claudette against the unknowing Pam.
Nothing happening here. Move on.
Slappable Faces: The Mother and Child Non-Reunion.
I feel vindicated. I had a feeling all along that Cindy didn't really give a rat's arse about the consequence of her one-off with TJ, something she now views as the biggest mistake in her life. Hey, you play with fire, you get burned. It's a bit too late now to wish your baby away.
In one of the more interesting dichotomies on the programme tonight, we had Martin, sitting on Arthur's bench, telling Carol that all he wanted in life was to have a wife who loved him and a family; then, sat on the Beale sofa, we have Liam professing literally the same thing to Cindy. Liam wants a family; Cindy wants to have fun. What she doesn't want is a baby. She hasn't even missed the child and doesn't really know if she loves her.
Listening to Rebecca talk about how her mother gave her up for adoption originally sparks a thought in Cindy's one braincell.
The character is another unlikeable sort on the show - smart-mouthed and too posh to be set well within the Beale fold,and cold enough that she can sit on the sofa where Lucy met her end without feeling cold chills down her back.
Surprising her at the end of the evening is the return of the most slappable face of all, Jane Beale, still pulling Ian's puppet strings. Bobby the Basher is ordered to bed, Cindy reluctantly takes Beth, and Ian is the only person in that dynamic, who's upset by looking at the space on the floor where Lucy lay dead, until Jane the Queen tells him everything is OK "because we've talked about this."
Jane's idea is to move house, but Ian's staying put. That's it Ian, make the bitch suffer.
Kathy, come home. Faces are waiting to be smacked.
Slappable Faces: Bubblegum Love.
Shabnam's anthem to Kush:-
Now this was interesting ... to a point. Listening to Kush's painful tale of his brief marriage was heartbreaking, especially his admission of feeling culpable regarding his wife's sudden death and how he behaved in reaction to that, sleeping with woman after woman and drinking to excess, until he moved away from his parents' home, moved to Walford and met Shabnam.
I could totally buy that. He's still in love with his wife and still grieving her, and it would take a tremendously strong woman to live with a man with his marriage date to his late first wife tattooed across his massive muscled shoulder.
Any woman with any nous would respect Kush's feelings and recognise that he's still grieving his wife, but that, in meeting a woman who connects with him in a way more important than just the physical way, he would want to take this relationship slowly, day by day even, until he's sure of something more permanent. Instead, Shabnam's social gaucherie immediately latches onto his thinking her different from the other women and suggests marriage again.
She doesn't understand that, although Kush really likes her, his feelings are too raw for Safira, and a marriage too soon after her death would negate and cast into doubt any feelings he may have had for her. Shabnam would be marrying a man and living with the ghost of his first wife.
Such intensity sends Kush scurrying. So Shabnam decides to bring the mountain to Mohammed, to use a bad pun.
Now, all of a sudden, she's backtracking? She admits she loves him, but doesn't really have to have marriage. So ... is this a situation of why-buy-the-cow-when-you-can-get-the-milk-for-free? This would explain Masood's reluctance when Shabnam announced that they were on again as a couple, but Masood can't say anything, because he's gambling big stakes, by the looks of that wad of cash, and that's also something a good Muslim wouldn't do.
I like Kush. He's arguably one of the best new characters DTC has introduced. Such a shame he's got messed up in this weird storyline.
Meh once again.
Apart from the return of the Beales, including the murderer and his accomplice, this episode had nothing to offer.
Slappable Faces: The Sitting in Judgement Part.
Martin was right: Sonia didn't deny having an affair with Tina, because that's exactly what she was doing the entire time she was in Walford, ostensibly for Carol's illness - sneaking about, getting drunk and snogging Tina.
What's amazing about all of this is Carol's non-reaction. Fair enough, the sexuality of your child isn't important as long as your child is happy in his or her skin; but Carol should have been concerned at what Sonia was up to behind Martin's back. In the scene where Carol and Martin talked, sitting on Arthur's bench, Carol was quick to point out all of Martin's faults, including his affair, without so much as alluding to anything that could have been Sonia's fault.
Sonia was unfaithful to Martin way long before Martin was unfaithful to her. Remember Naomi? (I see Sonia's finally discovered how to pronounce her name, after repeatedly referring to her as "Gnomi" back in 2006.) Sonia walked away from Martin and Rebecca on that instance, and - as Martin admitted tonight - Pauline was right all along about Sonia.
There was more trash-mouthing of Martin tonight.
Do you think HE's told Rebecca?
HE'd better not have told Rebecca or HE'll answer to me. (Really, Tina? Who the hell are you?)
I've got to get back there before HE tells her.
He, he, he ... spoken with the certainty that Martin was nothing less than a monster. He, himself, described himself in simple terms - he's just a man who wanted a wife and the sort of life and family his parents had; instead, he saw himself as being so boring he turned his wife lesbian.
If we're also going for infidelity on Sonia's part, since she's returned to Walford, she's done no less than try to snog Kush, and she's slept with Fatboy. Compared to Sonia, Martin's been an angel.
Sonia's the biggest kind of coward, and she's all over the place at the moment. She emotionally blackmailed Rebecca into giving up music school, promising the girl that her presence would mean the success of her parents' marriage; the next thing she's doing is trying to move in on Kush and sleeping with Fatboy, all the while buzzing around Tina.
Then there's the question of Tina, herself. Tina's never put anyone's needs before her own, including those of her own daughter, who won't touch her with a barge pole for fear of getting some bad disease, like the clap or something; so she's less than understanding about Sonia wanting to put her daughter's concerns before her own. The truth of the matter is that Sonia is still the biggest sort of coward in coming out of the closet. Still, lesbian or not, when she eventually begs the Court Jester for crumbs from her table, she should take heed of one thing - Tina is one of the last women on that Square with whom I'd want my child associated. She's feckless, dishonest, amoral, a liar, a cheater and a thief. When Tina and Sonia first got together, not only was Sonia still married to Martin, but Tina was in a relationship with Tosh. If Tina will cheat on one partner, she'll cheat on another.
Sonia is one of the most judgemental, self-righteous and annoying characters on the show, played by a woefully inept actress. Natalie Cassidy's emotive acting comes across with a face which looks as though she's in the continuous throes of constipation. She's bad on her own, she's vile with Tina. Tina's selfishness is as bad as Sonia, but in a different way. It meant nothing to her that Sonia's revelation of her new relationship just might have repercussions for her daughter. Tina simply kept screwing up her petulant faux-childlike face and repeating ~But you said but you said but you said ~.
Tina and Sonia deserve each other, and they should leave Walford together and forever.
I know many people are having a hard time adjusting to James Bye as Martin Fowler, but I felt he came into his own tonight, as the last bastion of an established family who finds himself terribly alone. One of the most poignant and sad scenes was at the end of the programme, with Sonia's blithe assessment that Martin would "be all right," not knowing that he's lost his business and the family home.
Think back to about the middle of last year, when Sonia mentioned to Carol that she and Martin were having mortgage troubles. This was right about the time she got suspended for having too much time off work. I would imagine Sonia's wage was much higher than Martin's, and with her leaving home, it never occurred to her to continue to pay her share of the mortgage in order to provide a secure home for her daughter. Or even to contribute to her support.
I'm not surprised, however, that Martin's become yet another loser of a weak Walford male with the man-haters in the writing room.
Slappable Facer: The Irony of the Moment.
Oh, my godfathers! An evening of girl talk and gossip and a bit of Donna's backstory, courtesy of Claudette and nosy Pam. Easily ascertained that Pam was the social worker who placed Donna with foster mother Claudette, and - Pam being Pam - she stuck around and maintained contact enough so that Les could get a whiff of Claudette. And the rest, they say, is history.
So we know now that Donna has "brothers", that she's desperate for a man, just like most of the other single females in Walford. Gotta have that man or else life isn't worth it. But between the two older women, they translated Donna's story - which Donna, rightly, said was no story at all - into two men - pardon, boys - fighting over Donna.
In the end, when Fatboy came around with Donna's present, she took it and ungratefully told him to leave.
There were a couple of moments of irony in that piece, which were supposed to make us do a bit of the nudge-nudge-wink-wink - Pam admiring Claudette's necklace, which Claudette said she'd had a long time; the cosy walk back to the Cokers' flat, arm and arm, when Pam casually remarks that Les was just mentioning Claudette the other day.
This is supposed to be clever?
It isn't, mostly because I don't give two hoots about Pam or Claudette's fanagling with Les behind her back, or really, Donna, whom we know really likes Fatboy, no matter how much she might turn her nose up at the naff gift he gave her.
That entire vignette was to set up a bit of Donna's backstory, and to juxtapose Claudette against the unknowing Pam.
Nothing happening here. Move on.
Slappable Faces: The Mother and Child Non-Reunion.
I feel vindicated. I had a feeling all along that Cindy didn't really give a rat's arse about the consequence of her one-off with TJ, something she now views as the biggest mistake in her life. Hey, you play with fire, you get burned. It's a bit too late now to wish your baby away.
In one of the more interesting dichotomies on the programme tonight, we had Martin, sitting on Arthur's bench, telling Carol that all he wanted in life was to have a wife who loved him and a family; then, sat on the Beale sofa, we have Liam professing literally the same thing to Cindy. Liam wants a family; Cindy wants to have fun. What she doesn't want is a baby. She hasn't even missed the child and doesn't really know if she loves her.
Listening to Rebecca talk about how her mother gave her up for adoption originally sparks a thought in Cindy's one braincell.
The character is another unlikeable sort on the show - smart-mouthed and too posh to be set well within the Beale fold,and cold enough that she can sit on the sofa where Lucy met her end without feeling cold chills down her back.
Surprising her at the end of the evening is the return of the most slappable face of all, Jane Beale, still pulling Ian's puppet strings. Bobby the Basher is ordered to bed, Cindy reluctantly takes Beth, and Ian is the only person in that dynamic, who's upset by looking at the space on the floor where Lucy lay dead, until Jane the Queen tells him everything is OK "because we've talked about this."
Jane's idea is to move house, but Ian's staying put. That's it Ian, make the bitch suffer.
Kathy, come home. Faces are waiting to be smacked.
Slappable Faces: Bubblegum Love.
Shabnam's anthem to Kush:-
Now this was interesting ... to a point. Listening to Kush's painful tale of his brief marriage was heartbreaking, especially his admission of feeling culpable regarding his wife's sudden death and how he behaved in reaction to that, sleeping with woman after woman and drinking to excess, until he moved away from his parents' home, moved to Walford and met Shabnam.
I could totally buy that. He's still in love with his wife and still grieving her, and it would take a tremendously strong woman to live with a man with his marriage date to his late first wife tattooed across his massive muscled shoulder.
Any woman with any nous would respect Kush's feelings and recognise that he's still grieving his wife, but that, in meeting a woman who connects with him in a way more important than just the physical way, he would want to take this relationship slowly, day by day even, until he's sure of something more permanent. Instead, Shabnam's social gaucherie immediately latches onto his thinking her different from the other women and suggests marriage again.
She doesn't understand that, although Kush really likes her, his feelings are too raw for Safira, and a marriage too soon after her death would negate and cast into doubt any feelings he may have had for her. Shabnam would be marrying a man and living with the ghost of his first wife.
Such intensity sends Kush scurrying. So Shabnam decides to bring the mountain to Mohammed, to use a bad pun.
Now, all of a sudden, she's backtracking? She admits she loves him, but doesn't really have to have marriage. So ... is this a situation of why-buy-the-cow-when-you-can-get-the-milk-for-free? This would explain Masood's reluctance when Shabnam announced that they were on again as a couple, but Masood can't say anything, because he's gambling big stakes, by the looks of that wad of cash, and that's also something a good Muslim wouldn't do.
I like Kush. He's arguably one of the best new characters DTC has introduced. Such a shame he's got messed up in this weird storyline.
Meh once again.
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