I usually don't rate Jesse O'Mahoney, but he was spot on tonight. Somehow, for some reason, the writers seem to have channeled Sharon and her true character, because previously, when O'Mahoney wrote for Sharon during the appalling Branning period, she was wooden and dull, but suddenly, Letitia Dean has found her mojo, and the Sharon who stared the Mitchells down is back.
And the other star tonight was Mimi Keene. The Cokers and their predicament put paid to what would have been a perfect ten of an episode, but I do like Paul and the fact that he's dead onto Les.
Team Cindy! Mimi Keene came into her own tonight. For all that episode should have had emphasis on Sharon and her mind games with Phil, Keene stole the show with a well deserved duff-duff and the only two words which could conceivably cause Jane and Ian to shit their pants ...
I know.
I hope all you astute viewers saw as well the psychopath known as Bobby and his eerie behaviour - his frightening, low-outched monotone delivery, with a subtly threatening undercurrent as he sat playing violent video games, as well as his covert threat directed at Cindy regarding Beth remaining with the Beales.
She better not cause any trouble.
No, because we know what happened to the last young woman who caused trouble in the Beale household, who met her end right where Bobby was sitting on the Beale sofa. If you think about how much emphasis and visual importance has been placed on that sofa and its surrounding area since the reveal, you can understand the total horror that's abiding within the Beale house.
And it's all come to a head with Cindy's situation.
Ian and Jane have behaved appallingly, and the social worker was equally as stupid and obtuse in siding with them and seeing Cindy as some unbalanced, little chit of a schoolgirl who would perhaps harm her child.
She's a kid. She had sex on a whim and got pregnant her first time. She allowed herself to be easily coerced into having a baby by the child's father, who was too young to cope with fatherhood, himself, and when faced with the prospect, he walked away. She realised all too late that having a baby set her apart from her peers. She's far too immature to be a mother, and she recognises that. She wants the best for this baby, but she doesn't want to be forced to watch her grow up daily in a situation where she's considered to be both her sister and a built-in babysitter whenever Ian and Jane decide to put their own interests first and the novelty of having a baby in the house wears off.
Ian and Jane have been the worst sort of bullies - one psychologically manipulating Cindy whilst the other belloweathers and issues threats. There's scant compassion in the pair, for all the numberof times they refer to her as "love." There simply is no love there. They're obliging her because she has something that they want - the child. Bobby wants a baby sister as much as he might want a new toy. Jane wants a baby to which she feels entitled, and Ian wants yet another chance to throw money at a child for a peaceful life and then wonder why he's failed.
I loved the fact that Cindy had and has both the Beales pegged solidly. She played a game with them, pushing the parameters - coming in late, demanding that she never babysit or be alone with Beth anymore and garnering the attic bedroom that both Bobby and Peter share. Whatever she asks for, they hasten to oblige.
She's cowered at first by the Beales in the presence of the social worker, who's clearly only interested in the child and how well she'll be cared for by the oh-so-middle-class Beales. I know social workers get a rough rap on EastEnders (remember Trish Barnes?), but how this woman could have seen Cindy as the danger to the child and the Beales as people eminently qualified to give Beth a loving and stable home, especially after Ian's rant about Cindy's demands,is all evidence of her stupidity.
Cindy may not want Beth around her, she may not feel ready to be reminded that she's a mother; but she may also not want Beth brought up in a household where a beetle-browed, monotoned, psychopathic little killer has whacked his sister to death, the sociopathic stepmother colluded in dumping the body on the Common and keeping it a secret the better part of a year, and the weak-willed, Oedipal weasel at the head of the household is caught in the selfsame maelstrom of lies, deceit and murder.
And Carol is naive to believe that she warned the Beales of what Cindy was planning to do because the creepy couple and Carol want what's best for her.
I felt immensely sorry for Cindy - bullied by the Beales, who would only play nice until they got Beth in their slimey little hands and then who knows what would happen to Cindy? They couldn't let her go; she knows too much. So what happens when she starts to "cause trouble" in the household? Does Bobby strike again? What happens when Beth starts teething and "causing trouble" for the household?
It's clear who calls the shots in Casa Beale.
Still, I'm happy she played her trump card. It's worth remembering what a Hammer House of Horror Ian Beale's house has become and how deeply ingrained he's become in concealing his daughter's killer and accomplice.
Go, Cindy. And don't forget that even though TJ might have walked away, his dad wanted to step up to the plate.
Young Love. Here's the message EastEnders is imparting to the viewers about the gay community: when you fall out with your partner or when things aren't right on the love front, revert to good old-fashioned heterosexual sex. When Sonia was dismayed by Tina, she ran to have sex with Martin. Ben's got a crush on Paul and he can't requite this crush in public, he's annoyed by Phil and ends up shagging Abi on the floor of The Arches.
Abi really is a sublimely stupid girl. Years ago, when she sought to seduce Jay and pop her cherry, she left a trail of transluscent candles all over Booty and up its staircase to a curiously flammable duvet on the floor - not to mention all those highly flammable beauty oils and hair sprays; now, tonight, she spreads the same bundle of transluscent candles - which must have cost a fortune - all over the garage, with the same sort of highly flammable textiles on the floor.
Really, Abi? All that naked flame in a place positively redolent of petrol and engine oil?
Abi was pathetically funny tonight, with all the emphasis on the pathos. Abi, Ben just isn't that into you. He's more into the photos from Grindr on his phone, particularly that of Paul Coker, so Abi seeks advice from her former friend and current nemesis, Lola, the most pitifully underused character on the programme.
Lola's facial expressions were a portrait of "too much information" and comically so, as Abi floundered about, thinking that a fumbly one night stand which produced Lexi would make her expert enough to tell Abi what Ben "liked." He likes boys, Abi, and the things boys do together sexually.
And what he had with you in the Arches, Abi, was frustrated, angry sex.
I dread the smirk she'll have on her face on Friday, and I'm a bit worried. DTC likes babies, and whenever Ben dips his wick into a heterosexual situation, he seems to leave the lady with child.
Watch this space.
The Croakers and the Snakey Bitch. Well, we got it early, so I suppose DTC et al have it out of their system. I'm talking about the ubiquitous topless shot of the latest piece of male beefcake on the show - Paul Coker.
That said, I like Paul. He's the one redeeming part of a truly awful family - overacting Les, nosey, hyperactive Pam (I've never seen a character gasp with excitement as much as Pam Coker).
(Gasp!) There's my grandson, Paul.
(Gasp!) I don't know whether to hug or kiss you!
(Gasp!) It's my birthday! Breakfast in bed!
(Gasp!) Ooh, The Albert! All this for me!
(Gasp!) I don't want to dance anymore, Shrimpy!
He's onto Les, and he's got no time for Claudette's shenanigans as well. Speaking of which, she came across as one preening, slimey bitch tonight, the way she sidled into the bar, admiring Vincent's "accomplishment." All his bar? All his and Kim's bar? I think not.
I notice that Claudette is quick to trashmouth Paul, who knows exactly what's been going on between her and his grandfather.
Do I care? Do the viewers? No. The Cokers are an atrociously boring couple, played by two hammy actors, but Paul is their ace in the hole. There's a mother out there someplace, who'll return someday, and I suspect she, Pam (the lesser of two evils) and Paul will set up some sort of household.
Les and the abysmal Claudette can go fall down a hole someplace. Get Paul away from these crypt-like people and into an affair with Ben that will bite Abi hard.
Sharon's One-upmanship. That's one-nil to Sharon, and boy, was that done with panache and style. That was Den's daughter, who isn't afraid to use a person remorselessly and hit below the belt in order to achieve what she wants.
And this time, Phil was genuinely stymied because Sharon kept up the pretence flawlessly about Gordon being her dad. Phil's head was spinning, but Sharon was one-up on him all the way. In what appeared to be a sleepless night for everyone in Walford, she even had Phil there.
Phil orders that Gordon be gone by morning?
Sharon: You can forget about seeing one penny of that money if you're gone by the time I wake up!
Cooking a fry-up, taking him on a tour of Walford and for a drink in the Vic, Sharon was in her element, and Phil was clearly confused and uncomfortable. Sharon wanted one thing - she wanted to hear Phil admit to her face that Gordon wasn't her father.
This boiled down to a hyper game of Blink.
Sharon proposes that she and Phil pay to renovate Gordon's house, and Phil sat stolid, but uncomfortable at Sharon piling thousands of pounds in Gordon's hands. He even tried to run away with the money, because Gordon was as bemused and uncomfortable as Phil. It seems Gordon was "supplied" by Ritchie.
All it took was Linda being introduced by Phil to Sharon's father to send Sharon weeping into the toilet, where Linda found and confronted her, having heard about The Albert. When Sharon asserted that Gordon wasn't her dad, Linda misunderstood and thought she meant that he wasn't what she thought he'd be, but then Sharon revealed that this was a man whom Phil had paid to impersonate her father. She asked Linda what she'd have done had Mick ever pulled a trick like that, but Linda can't fathom, because Mick would never have done that.
Sharon has to hear Phil admit, himself, what he'd done, so she does what only a daughter of Den Watts would do - she uses the thing closest to Phil's heart and hits below the belt.
What a huge surprise to hear Sharon stride from the Ladies' to meet Ben and announce that she wanted Gordon to tell Ben about Kathy. I thought Phil would gag a maggot at that one! But she only wanted to push the right buttons to force Phil's hand. She kept prodding Gordon about his memories of Kathy, how Kathy was kind to him when he'd nick fruit off the market ... on and on until Phil was forced to admit, and publically ... and loudly ... that Gordon wasn't Sharon's father.
Sharon made him repeat it. Repetition for emphasis and all that. And not only is Sharon visibly disgusted and annoyed, but Ben is also. He cannot fathom why Phil would have done that.
To Gordon, in another day and age known as Nick the Greek, goes the optimum line of the night as he departed:-
You lot are twisted!
Back at chez Mitchell, when Phil confronts Sharon, she's righteous. She didn't want to involve or hurt Ben, but he had to hear Phil admit what he'd done. She's confused as to why he's done this, but she issues a Lysistrata ultimatum. She's going to get her bar back and find her father, and she doesn't want Phil near her until she does so. She can't even admit anymore to Linda that she loves Phil, and is this any wonder.
I've no doubt Phil has his valid reasons for keeping Gavin's existence a secret from Sharon, but this has all come across to her in the wrong way, especially since it's been tainted by his sacrificing her business at the altar of Roswell Ronnie's arse.
Sharon's being served with some great one-liners in the past two episodes, and she got in another tonight when Phil returned home to find she'd packed his bag for him.
Well, what did you expect? Your dinner on the table?
You go, girlfriend. Someplace Den, Angie and Pauline are pissing themselves with laughter.
And the other star tonight was Mimi Keene. The Cokers and their predicament put paid to what would have been a perfect ten of an episode, but I do like Paul and the fact that he's dead onto Les.
Team Cindy! Mimi Keene came into her own tonight. For all that episode should have had emphasis on Sharon and her mind games with Phil, Keene stole the show with a well deserved duff-duff and the only two words which could conceivably cause Jane and Ian to shit their pants ...
I know.
I hope all you astute viewers saw as well the psychopath known as Bobby and his eerie behaviour - his frightening, low-outched monotone delivery, with a subtly threatening undercurrent as he sat playing violent video games, as well as his covert threat directed at Cindy regarding Beth remaining with the Beales.
She better not cause any trouble.
No, because we know what happened to the last young woman who caused trouble in the Beale household, who met her end right where Bobby was sitting on the Beale sofa. If you think about how much emphasis and visual importance has been placed on that sofa and its surrounding area since the reveal, you can understand the total horror that's abiding within the Beale house.
And it's all come to a head with Cindy's situation.
Ian and Jane have behaved appallingly, and the social worker was equally as stupid and obtuse in siding with them and seeing Cindy as some unbalanced, little chit of a schoolgirl who would perhaps harm her child.
She's a kid. She had sex on a whim and got pregnant her first time. She allowed herself to be easily coerced into having a baby by the child's father, who was too young to cope with fatherhood, himself, and when faced with the prospect, he walked away. She realised all too late that having a baby set her apart from her peers. She's far too immature to be a mother, and she recognises that. She wants the best for this baby, but she doesn't want to be forced to watch her grow up daily in a situation where she's considered to be both her sister and a built-in babysitter whenever Ian and Jane decide to put their own interests first and the novelty of having a baby in the house wears off.
Ian and Jane have been the worst sort of bullies - one psychologically manipulating Cindy whilst the other belloweathers and issues threats. There's scant compassion in the pair, for all the numberof times they refer to her as "love." There simply is no love there. They're obliging her because she has something that they want - the child. Bobby wants a baby sister as much as he might want a new toy. Jane wants a baby to which she feels entitled, and Ian wants yet another chance to throw money at a child for a peaceful life and then wonder why he's failed.
I loved the fact that Cindy had and has both the Beales pegged solidly. She played a game with them, pushing the parameters - coming in late, demanding that she never babysit or be alone with Beth anymore and garnering the attic bedroom that both Bobby and Peter share. Whatever she asks for, they hasten to oblige.
She's cowered at first by the Beales in the presence of the social worker, who's clearly only interested in the child and how well she'll be cared for by the oh-so-middle-class Beales. I know social workers get a rough rap on EastEnders (remember Trish Barnes?), but how this woman could have seen Cindy as the danger to the child and the Beales as people eminently qualified to give Beth a loving and stable home, especially after Ian's rant about Cindy's demands,is all evidence of her stupidity.
Cindy may not want Beth around her, she may not feel ready to be reminded that she's a mother; but she may also not want Beth brought up in a household where a beetle-browed, monotoned, psychopathic little killer has whacked his sister to death, the sociopathic stepmother colluded in dumping the body on the Common and keeping it a secret the better part of a year, and the weak-willed, Oedipal weasel at the head of the household is caught in the selfsame maelstrom of lies, deceit and murder.
And Carol is naive to believe that she warned the Beales of what Cindy was planning to do because the creepy couple and Carol want what's best for her.
I felt immensely sorry for Cindy - bullied by the Beales, who would only play nice until they got Beth in their slimey little hands and then who knows what would happen to Cindy? They couldn't let her go; she knows too much. So what happens when she starts to "cause trouble" in the household? Does Bobby strike again? What happens when Beth starts teething and "causing trouble" for the household?
It's clear who calls the shots in Casa Beale.
Still, I'm happy she played her trump card. It's worth remembering what a Hammer House of Horror Ian Beale's house has become and how deeply ingrained he's become in concealing his daughter's killer and accomplice.
Go, Cindy. And don't forget that even though TJ might have walked away, his dad wanted to step up to the plate.
Young Love. Here's the message EastEnders is imparting to the viewers about the gay community: when you fall out with your partner or when things aren't right on the love front, revert to good old-fashioned heterosexual sex. When Sonia was dismayed by Tina, she ran to have sex with Martin. Ben's got a crush on Paul and he can't requite this crush in public, he's annoyed by Phil and ends up shagging Abi on the floor of The Arches.
Abi really is a sublimely stupid girl. Years ago, when she sought to seduce Jay and pop her cherry, she left a trail of transluscent candles all over Booty and up its staircase to a curiously flammable duvet on the floor - not to mention all those highly flammable beauty oils and hair sprays; now, tonight, she spreads the same bundle of transluscent candles - which must have cost a fortune - all over the garage, with the same sort of highly flammable textiles on the floor.
Really, Abi? All that naked flame in a place positively redolent of petrol and engine oil?
Abi was pathetically funny tonight, with all the emphasis on the pathos. Abi, Ben just isn't that into you. He's more into the photos from Grindr on his phone, particularly that of Paul Coker, so Abi seeks advice from her former friend and current nemesis, Lola, the most pitifully underused character on the programme.
Lola's facial expressions were a portrait of "too much information" and comically so, as Abi floundered about, thinking that a fumbly one night stand which produced Lexi would make her expert enough to tell Abi what Ben "liked." He likes boys, Abi, and the things boys do together sexually.
And what he had with you in the Arches, Abi, was frustrated, angry sex.
I dread the smirk she'll have on her face on Friday, and I'm a bit worried. DTC likes babies, and whenever Ben dips his wick into a heterosexual situation, he seems to leave the lady with child.
Watch this space.
The Croakers and the Snakey Bitch. Well, we got it early, so I suppose DTC et al have it out of their system. I'm talking about the ubiquitous topless shot of the latest piece of male beefcake on the show - Paul Coker.
That said, I like Paul. He's the one redeeming part of a truly awful family - overacting Les, nosey, hyperactive Pam (I've never seen a character gasp with excitement as much as Pam Coker).
(Gasp!) There's my grandson, Paul.
(Gasp!) I don't know whether to hug or kiss you!
(Gasp!) It's my birthday! Breakfast in bed!
(Gasp!) Ooh, The Albert! All this for me!
(Gasp!) I don't want to dance anymore, Shrimpy!
He's onto Les, and he's got no time for Claudette's shenanigans as well. Speaking of which, she came across as one preening, slimey bitch tonight, the way she sidled into the bar, admiring Vincent's "accomplishment." All his bar? All his and Kim's bar? I think not.
I notice that Claudette is quick to trashmouth Paul, who knows exactly what's been going on between her and his grandfather.
Do I care? Do the viewers? No. The Cokers are an atrociously boring couple, played by two hammy actors, but Paul is their ace in the hole. There's a mother out there someplace, who'll return someday, and I suspect she, Pam (the lesser of two evils) and Paul will set up some sort of household.
Les and the abysmal Claudette can go fall down a hole someplace. Get Paul away from these crypt-like people and into an affair with Ben that will bite Abi hard.
Sharon's One-upmanship. That's one-nil to Sharon, and boy, was that done with panache and style. That was Den's daughter, who isn't afraid to use a person remorselessly and hit below the belt in order to achieve what she wants.
And this time, Phil was genuinely stymied because Sharon kept up the pretence flawlessly about Gordon being her dad. Phil's head was spinning, but Sharon was one-up on him all the way. In what appeared to be a sleepless night for everyone in Walford, she even had Phil there.
Phil orders that Gordon be gone by morning?
Sharon: You can forget about seeing one penny of that money if you're gone by the time I wake up!
Cooking a fry-up, taking him on a tour of Walford and for a drink in the Vic, Sharon was in her element, and Phil was clearly confused and uncomfortable. Sharon wanted one thing - she wanted to hear Phil admit to her face that Gordon wasn't her father.
This boiled down to a hyper game of Blink.
Sharon proposes that she and Phil pay to renovate Gordon's house, and Phil sat stolid, but uncomfortable at Sharon piling thousands of pounds in Gordon's hands. He even tried to run away with the money, because Gordon was as bemused and uncomfortable as Phil. It seems Gordon was "supplied" by Ritchie.
All it took was Linda being introduced by Phil to Sharon's father to send Sharon weeping into the toilet, where Linda found and confronted her, having heard about The Albert. When Sharon asserted that Gordon wasn't her dad, Linda misunderstood and thought she meant that he wasn't what she thought he'd be, but then Sharon revealed that this was a man whom Phil had paid to impersonate her father. She asked Linda what she'd have done had Mick ever pulled a trick like that, but Linda can't fathom, because Mick would never have done that.
Sharon has to hear Phil admit, himself, what he'd done, so she does what only a daughter of Den Watts would do - she uses the thing closest to Phil's heart and hits below the belt.
What a huge surprise to hear Sharon stride from the Ladies' to meet Ben and announce that she wanted Gordon to tell Ben about Kathy. I thought Phil would gag a maggot at that one! But she only wanted to push the right buttons to force Phil's hand. She kept prodding Gordon about his memories of Kathy, how Kathy was kind to him when he'd nick fruit off the market ... on and on until Phil was forced to admit, and publically ... and loudly ... that Gordon wasn't Sharon's father.
Sharon made him repeat it. Repetition for emphasis and all that. And not only is Sharon visibly disgusted and annoyed, but Ben is also. He cannot fathom why Phil would have done that.
To Gordon, in another day and age known as Nick the Greek, goes the optimum line of the night as he departed:-
You lot are twisted!
Back at chez Mitchell, when Phil confronts Sharon, she's righteous. She didn't want to involve or hurt Ben, but he had to hear Phil admit what he'd done. She's confused as to why he's done this, but she issues a Lysistrata ultimatum. She's going to get her bar back and find her father, and she doesn't want Phil near her until she does so. She can't even admit anymore to Linda that she loves Phil, and is this any wonder.
I've no doubt Phil has his valid reasons for keeping Gavin's existence a secret from Sharon, but this has all come across to her in the wrong way, especially since it's been tainted by his sacrificing her business at the altar of Roswell Ronnie's arse.
Sharon's being served with some great one-liners in the past two episodes, and she got in another tonight when Phil returned home to find she'd packed his bag for him.
Well, what did you expect? Your dinner on the table?
You go, girlfriend. Someplace Den, Angie and Pauline are pissing themselves with laughter.
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