While sweet *Betty* the fanboi of Walford Web Kindergarten desperately wanks cries into his cereal, at the news that Gillian Taylforth is bound for Hollyoaks (along with Daniella Westbrook), we're also greeted with the news that no less than Timothy West is Corrie-bound, to partner Sue Johnston.
Bryan Kirkwood, back at his Hollyoaks stomping ground, has aimed the stiff middle finger right at EastEnders. As long as Westbrook is in Hollyoaks, Sam Mitchell can't come swanning back to Walford leading Jack Branning's sprog, Richard, by the hand - unless we change her head back into Kim Medcalf once again.
And Kathy Beale Mitchell Whatever is dead.
Still, it speaks volumes that Coronation Street gets established actors like West and Johnston, along with Stephanie Cole, into their fold, whilst EastEnders get untried reality stars (Danielle Harold), underwear models hired for the beefcake factor (Witts and Discipline, although in Discipline's case, the beefcake is turning to lard), a Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves representative (Shona McGarty) and a gurning girl (Jossa).
Jark (of Walford Web), who's the voice of reason on that website at the moment, asks rhetorically, "Where are the storylines?" Well, I ask, where are the established actors who used to flock to EastEnders, even for a guest stint? Sheila Hancock, Susan George, Nicky Henson, Edward Woodward (oh, all right, he's dead); but you get my drift.
In addition to the above dead weight walking, we get even more dead weight on the show who really should be shifted - yes, I'm talking about Scott Maslen and Jessie Wallace. Wallace's character was built up by TPTB only to be demolished as thoroughly as Zainab's water feature. Yet Lorraine Newman is sacrificing definitely one, and probably two viable characters exclusively for the redemption of Kat Moon.
As well as asking where the storylines and established actors are, I'd also ask where the hell are Lorraine Newman's balls? Or at least an axe.
Bryan Kirkwood, back at his Hollyoaks stomping ground, has aimed the stiff middle finger right at EastEnders. As long as Westbrook is in Hollyoaks, Sam Mitchell can't come swanning back to Walford leading Jack Branning's sprog, Richard, by the hand - unless we change her head back into Kim Medcalf once again.
And Kathy Beale Mitchell Whatever is dead.
Still, it speaks volumes that Coronation Street gets established actors like West and Johnston, along with Stephanie Cole, into their fold, whilst EastEnders get untried reality stars (Danielle Harold), underwear models hired for the beefcake factor (Witts and Discipline, although in Discipline's case, the beefcake is turning to lard), a Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves representative (Shona McGarty) and a gurning girl (Jossa).
Jark (of Walford Web), who's the voice of reason on that website at the moment, asks rhetorically, "Where are the storylines?" Well, I ask, where are the established actors who used to flock to EastEnders, even for a guest stint? Sheila Hancock, Susan George, Nicky Henson, Edward Woodward (oh, all right, he's dead); but you get my drift.
In addition to the above dead weight walking, we get even more dead weight on the show who really should be shifted - yes, I'm talking about Scott Maslen and Jessie Wallace. Wallace's character was built up by TPTB only to be demolished as thoroughly as Zainab's water feature. Yet Lorraine Newman is sacrificing definitely one, and probably two viable characters exclusively for the redemption of Kat Moon.
As well as asking where the storylines and established actors are, I'd also ask where the hell are Lorraine Newman's balls? Or at least an axe.
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