Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Bully Culture - Review: 29.10.2013

Albert Square, the place where bullies and fools are ascendant.

The sense of community is symbolised by football. No one has a nice word to say about anyone else. No one takes responsibility for their actions. Everyone's got an excuse. Everyone's mean to one another. Psychopaths are pitied, pampered and worshipped by people who should know better.

In Walford abused people become abusers. Think about that in connection with Whitney's misbehaviour toward Denny in retaliation for his misbehaviour. Denny is a child of seven, unable to reason. Whitney is an adult in a position of authority and control. As a so-called educational professional who has a duty of care in loco parentis during Denny's school hours, she could, in theory, after her astoundingly viscious, vindictive and cruel verbal meanderings about the child to authorities and to the child's mother, she could so easily be as guilty of abuse - albeit different from the sort she suffered - of a child in her care. 

Even worse than EastEnders' wanton depiction of this incident as a vindication of Whitney, one of the vilest and most entitled characters in the show, are the reactions of several so-called enlightened members of the viewing public - including the insipid ilovenicnacs commentator who purports to work with children but who revels in calling various of them "little gobshites" and is all for corporally punishing Denny, or the increasingly irrelevent bucolic troll vald, another advocate of child abuse, and the example of the lobotomic target audience of EastEnders, xTonix, who can see that Denny is a brat, but won't accept that Whitney the Walford Mattress is the worst sort - because she's an adult who'll bully a child.

Tonight we saw various sorts of bullies at play. Because, even with the positive backroom changes announced today by the Saviour DTC, the show is becoming a cesspit of bullies and chavs.

This is not EastEnders.

The Jackson-Beale-Butchers: The Bullies Relax and Celebrate at Home.

Let me make it abundantly clear: David Beale Wicks doesn't love Carol. She was a quick bunk-up behind the bike sheds which resulted in Bianca. After that, it was just comfort sex - when he was being ostracised by the then-decent Square for bonking his brother's wife, and years later when he was grieving his mother's death, and Carol was willing.

But then, Carol has always been willing, for whoever is male and finds her attractive meat at the moment. Her yougest son's friend, a married recruitment officer, Eddie Moon, a probation officer, Masood, there have been so many.

For all her step-granddaughter has proven to be a right little entitled strumpet in her guise as the Walford Mattress, Carol can be viewed as an old bike. Worse than what she calls herself (a 4 x 4), she's anybody's, really. Sort of a human version of the Dartford Tunnel, shepherding any manner of sexual intercourse from Kent into the bowels of Essex.

She's a great model of morality for her children and her grandchildren, and any success her children might enjoy in life, they do so in spite of and not due to Carol.

Let's be honest: she is an old boot.

David Beale Wicks is a player, a commitment-phobe who hasn't changed in all the years of his life. Witness his first stint on Albert Square. He spent the best part of his time getting out of emotional entanglements with his standard excuse line of "It's what I do."

What he's after now is a permanent home, rent-free, food cooked on the table, the kids as buffers and comfort sex until someone like Roxy Mitchell or Sadie Young or Kirsty Branning catches his eye. 

This is why I can't buy the "grandad" routine. What summed up my disgust was skanky Whitney's smug sugary sweet remark about it being so nice to spend an evening as a family, before adding ...

After all, my job's safe now ...

But of course, if her job hadn't been safe, the family evening wouldn't have been worth it. Equally cheesy was Tiffany, the despicably spoiled child, putting on the sweet sincere face to ask if they could all stay in with Grandad.

Must I point out that Grandad's popularity is relative to the wads of cash he seems to carry about in his pocket and liberally distribute. Remember Whitney didn't warm to David until he crossed her palm with a fistful of money. Because that's what this family is all about - from Whitney robbing the Millers' Lottery ticket to Bianca stealing from the stallholders.

Masood deserves better than a skank like Carol.

The Bully as a Victim.

Can we agree that the one psychopath to remain in the Square - she who confirmed today that she's sticking around to mould the show into The Ronnie Show - is actually a passive-aggressive bullying bitch?

Alfie, the only person concerned with the awful babyswap storyline - you know, the one which doesn't matter because Tommy doesn't remember? - has been cajoled, coerced and passively bullied into accepting Ronnie into his home, inviting her into his home and to his table.

Of course, into all of this, Alfie's been presented as the big bad bugaboo, implying that if someone commits a heinous criminal act against yourself or your person, if there's a soupcon of forgetfulness on the part of the victim, the crime doesn't matter. Alfie's been implored to move on and to move on by embracing the woman who put him through hell for four months.

One side observation ... last night, when Alfie returned, Kat remarked that Alfie couldn't solve his problems by running away, which was absolutely rich coming from her. I seem to recall that the mad dash on instant holiday last year, which the Moons effected, was instigated by Kat in a mad rush to stop Alfie from finding out who Shaggerman was. So Kat ran away from that situation.

I suppose it's what they do - you know,like Grandad Wicks running from commitment when it becomes all too boring.

Of course, Ronnie the Functioninc Psychopath witnesses a bit of banter between Kat and Alfie and saves it for a moment in which to threaten him with whatever should he break Ronnie's heart. Oh, and she doesn't care what's happened before.

This woman is rich. Who the fuck does she think she is? She's invited into the house of the man whose son she kidnapped and kept for four months. She admits that Alfie is marrying soon, but also tries to manipulate Roxy into believing that she's marrying too soon as well.

And that may very well be true, because ... is Roxy really divorced? Sean disappeared on New Year's Day 2009. That's little over three yeas ago. A de facto divorce via abandonment can't be effected until nothing's been heard from the abandoning spouse for seven years. No one knew or knows where Sean is - not Stacey, not Roxy and certainly not even Jean. 

So how can any divorce papers have been served?

This is another instance of EastEnders being sloppy with numbers and facts. Yes, it's damned too soon for Roxy to be marrying again. She needs to either find Sean and wait six months for the decree absolute or wait four more years.

But Ronnie's arrogance beggars belief. It's none of her business what Alfie feels for Roxy. There will always be a bond with Kat because of Tommy and what they endured. Ronnie doesn't give a rat's arse about anyone else. Just ask Joel Reynolds's wife and kids when she broke up his family because of something she wanted.

I hate this bitch.

Yet another manipulative bully who'll be presented as a character for whom we should root.

The Psychopath and His Acolyte.

Right, so Michael becomes increasingly weird, speaking in Zen-like riddles and confusing everyone in the bargain.

It amazes me how pigshit thick people like Kat are, who are snookered into thinking that Michael is a nice person, a lost soul in need of a friend, a good father to Scarlett, when he's nothing of the sort.

Michael's (a)moral dilemma tonight was that he was faced with the fact that, in the absence of Alice the Acolyte, he would have to kill Janine. He would have to seize the moment and drug her coffee or, grab the kitchen knife and plunge it deep into her body.

Janine has learned how to deal with this pathetic human being. She knows everything is a game to him; he even admitted that their marriage and her pregnancy was a game of challenge to him. Oh, but he takes the moral high ground with Scarlett, fancying himself the perfect parent, when she was left in the care of an inexperienced nanny and when he couldn't even speak her name. Notice how he tried to suck Janine into his vortex, likening his lack of a family background to Janines but she wasn't buying it.

Janine may have been pushed from pillar to post, but she knows now, in hindsight, that she always had Pat as a point of reference.

All of this poignant farewell to Kat (You've been a good friend, Kathleen), the lingering gazes at Alfie's and Tommy's pictures wasn't a testimony to a suicide attempt; it was Michael's shit-scared realisation that, in his having to kill Janine, he would ultimately be the prime suspect and would likely be apprehended. He was immersed in self-pity.

And so, we're now asked to believe that Alice the Acolyte is now that mad to have gone right to the police, sat for an hour waiting to make a statement about a man planning to murder his wife, and she suddenly has an epiphany that Derek never loved her, never came looking for her ... errrr, Alice, if you'd care to remember, your father left your mother when she was pregnant and he didn't know, so he didn't know about you, Dipshit.

And because of this brilliant epiphany, she wants to help Michael kill Janine.

Either this woman is incredibly stupid, or she's trapping him.

Blowing Bubbles of Hot Air.

Message to EastEnders: Football is not everyone's religion,and presenting cack-handedly bad storylines about amateur football teams will not get bums on seats.

Since when did Danny Pennant know Dot well enough to call her by her first name? How many times were we exhorted to remember that this charity event was all about "Dot's roof?"

Billy scoring a hattrick? Pull the other one. Billy stealing silly Danny's four grand? Maybe. But then Danny could have stolen it too.

And then there's that other well-known thief - hairy Cindy the Greek.

Please, can she leave now? Not only does she look like a boy in drag, she's also a mouth-breather and she simply has no purpose in the show. Danny was right - she's incredibly annoying, and she's only too aware of the camera being on her hirsute face.

An unnecessary character who thinks too highly of herself.

The highlight of the night was Michael Moon describing sports-clad chavs as common.

Thank goodness this is the last of the abysmal Katie Douglas. Och aye.


  1. Ronnie has just reappeared on my screen, and I must say, I am hating it. She is my new hit-the-fast-forward-button character. (Probably because I havent seen Ava & Co for a while, not that I am complaining). I read in an interview that Sam Womack has already confessed to practically just phoning in and picking up the cheque. But dont worry, she promises, when DTC takes over, the magic will return.
    The only good thing I can think of, is they have moved her from Tragedy Queen to the vacant psychopath role.
    That means Sharon can go back to Tragedy Queen and hopefully the writing, etc will improve for her. While it doesnt look like she will be getting the Vic, I hope she gets back to the centre of things.
    Speaking of the Vic, I see the new pictures are up. They own a dog. So that is good for long term tenancy, or, the dog will "disappear" in 6 months, and they will be gone in 9.

    Professor Plum

  2. You're so right about Ronnie.