Thursday, October 25, 2012

No-Brainers on DS, Consider This

Is there a shortage of brain cells about? Because there seems to be a plethora of people all sharing one brain cell posting now on Digital Spy's Soap Forum.

Consider the thread about the possibiltiy of Sid Owen returning to EastEnders.

If you're able to remember, you'll recall Bryan Kirkwood's lie about Sid Owen taking a year's sabbatical, after he lied about Patsy Palmer taking an extended maternity leave. Such were his lies, that the viewing public were verily confused when, under the weakest of pretexts and an amazing show of abject hypocrisy by Bianca, Ricky left Walford last January, accompanied by Julia's Theme.

After popping back for Janine's wedding mid-year, allegely Sid Owen announced that he'd quit EastEnders for good and wasn't returning. Again, allegedly, this centred around rumours that Owen had heard that, since Palmer wasn't returning for the foreseeable future, the character of Ricky couldn't stand on his own and was being axed - so Owen jumped before he was pushed, ostensibly because of Kirkwood's lies and fuck-ups.

Now, he's saying, not only that he's ready to return, but that he's returning soon (hint hint).

Consider this.

Lorraine Newman is supposed  to have nous and to know the soul of EastEnders. As it was long ago decreed after Owen's failed return back in 2003, sans Palmer, that Ricky doesn't do well without Bianca, so the reverse is true. The Bianca to which we were subjected from January until June was one of the vilest specimens of chavs ever to appear on the programme.

She had no common sense, was incapable of looking after, caring for or disciplining her children, stole with impunity, was dishonest, entitled, lazy, feckless, ungrateful, rude, and totally pejorative. There was nothing to like about her at all. Returning soon from her second stint in prison, without Ricky, it's difficult to see a future for Bianca in Walford, apart from delegating all heavy-duty parental work onto Carol's shoulders while she acts as though she's more the oldest sibling rather than a parent.

I would like to think Newman is, at last, stepping up to the plate and realising that, if we have to suffer Patsy Palmer, then she does best with Sid Owen, and maybe she's approached Sid about returning as Ricky. Maybe she's, at last, beginning to earn the massive salary we, the licence-fee payers, accord her.

That's pretty plausible.

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