Friday, January 11, 2013

Is Ava a Raver?

I ask that because, although I was impressed with her anger at the situation the little cock who is her son created last night, as an ex-teacher and a linguist, I was singularly less than impressed with her reversion to improper grammer. Reference:-

He's your husband who ain't your husband.

Woman, please.

No self-respecting teacher would revert to that sort of ungrammatical expression. In fact, I was raised to recoil instantaneously at the use of "ain't" unless it were used intentionally to prove a point, and then only as a verbal illustration.

Come on, Ava was supposedly raised by a middle-class couple in Surbiton, Surrey - the aegis of true middle-class, home to The Good Life. Her fragrant half-sister, Tanya, would kill, literally, to have a mock Tudor home in Surbiton and to emulate Margo Leadbetter. She tries to do so with the twinsets and the gloves already. Yet there she was, shouting the odds like a Walford fishwife, showing her true spiritual colours as the eldest daughter of the old gray nag drunk.

Everyone who sincerely wanted this character to be good and positive and strong and kind, was wont to scream at the television screen ...

RUN, AVA, RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Run for the hills. Run as far away from Walford as you can, and don't look back. Put your birth family firmly in the furthest recesses of your mind and forget about them. In fact, hang your head in shame and forget about them. Leave the little cock you've spawned to move amongst them. He's really their sort fo person and will fit into their dysfunctional, inbred lifestyle very nicely.

But but but ...

We know Ava's not going to be nice and kind and strong and positive and good, is she.


Well, because Ava is well-educated and (until last night) well-spoken. She's a professional person, a deputy head teacher, in a position of trust in the community.

Remind you of anyone else who lived in Walford for awhile?

Well, remember ...

The nice, sweet, posh lady doctor? (Tanya really, really, really, really, really wanted to be her friend, even though, behind Tanya's back, she referred to the community as "the great unwashed?")

Here's how she ended up...

Or how about ...

That sweet, slightly dippy solicitor who almost married Phil Mitchell?

Well, this is what happened to her ...

Or ...

This well-respected clergyman, a man of God ...

Well, he went on a killing spree, chalking up his ex, his wife's ex, and their poor dog  until ...

Or this good doctor ...

Burnt toast ...

It's a well-established fact that anyone arriving in Walford a well-spoken, well-educated, professional working in a position of trust is a closeted, certified stark raving mad lunatic, who'll end up swinging after he or she has swung for someone resident on the Square.

If I were Cora the Old Bora, I'd be afraid ... very afraid of Ava and the Little Cock from Hell (especially if he pukes green vomit and his head turns all the way around).

Ava's a teacher, which makes her a viable successor to any one of the sectionable above. In fact, it's a good thing Abi doesn't have guinea pigs anymore, because this is the least we can expect from Ava ...

Hang on ... isn't Ava going to be involved with Bianca in some way, and doesn't little Tiff have a kitten?

For everyone on Digital Spy thinking Kirsty's the bunny boiler, they seriously need to start looking at Ava, based on previous characters of her ilk.

Then again, maybe Ava's character will actually be a fully-fledged axe murderer and start the much-needed Branning cull, with Cora the Bora being the first in line ...

The Branning Bloodshed Begins with Cora

Well, if Numptie Newman won't wield an axe, at least Ava might. Can you imagine her bursting through the door swinging her axe, screaming:-

Cora, Dexter ... I'm h-o-o-o-me!


  1. I can see where you are coming from but I think that's really down to the writing- and one slip up- so I don't think her use of 'ain't' is anything to worry about.

    Although you were raised to not use colloquial language, Ava could easily have picked it up somewhere- maybe her foster parents weren't as strict?

    1. No, I wasn't raised not to use colloquial language, I was taught by teachers in a very rural and somewhat economically poor area of the country. We were country kids, and the way out of a dead-end existance was via education in those days. Proper spoken and written grammar was instilled in people in those days as it made an impression when one looked for work. It was taught to such a degree that, for most people, it became an unconscious habit. Sure, people reverted to colloquialism from time to time, but teachers, as a whole, or people training to be teachers, simply didn't. And still don't.

      However, I'm wary of Ava, especially given the temperament she's shown now and especially regarding her attitude to her son. I think, in the long run, Ava, Cora and Dexter are going to deserve each other. EastEnders doesn't do educated professional people very well - they usually aren't what they appear to be (May, Stella, Yusef, Lucas), so it wouldn't surprise me at all if Ava turned out to be a stark, raving mad axe murderer.

      She's leaving a teaching/deputy head's job in the middle of the school year. Something's happened there.