EastEnders does BOGOF ... Buy One Get One Free.
Instead of one recogniseable build-up tonight, we get two.
We also got another big autumn build-up today with the news that Bianca is getting a love interest - some bald comic of whom I've never heard, who looks like something from Right Said Fred.
If it ain't broke, don't fix it; and Ricky and Bianca weren't broken. Until, by various means and misinformation, Bryan Kirkwood (it's that man again!) managed to do so.
You know for years, after Anne Kirkbride got cancer, Ken and Deirdre were kept apart, and when she returned, she had a ridiculous Kidneygate romance with a Moroccan toyboy, whilst Ken was involved with a much younger woman who'd had his child. After being scammed by a conman and imprisoned, some producer actually figured out that Ken and Deirdre worked best together, and not with anyone else. This was ever thus with Pauline and Arthur.
Frank and Pat worked a treat. Frank and Peggy, not so much. Grant and Sharon were iconic; Grant and Tiffany were tragic; Sharon and Dennis were just ... meh.
Ricky and Bianca ... yes. Who can ever forget the mellifluous sound of Rick-AYYYYYYYYY!?
Terry and Bianca ... no, not the same thing at all. Besides, the character is supposed to have kids - more teenagers and probably an ex-wife somewhere. This, we don't need.
Kudos to DTC for trying and for hitting the ground running; but maybe he'd get bigger kudos if he'd just realise that just maybe Bianca's reached her sell-by date.
The Beginning of the Big Build-Up.
The Top Dog Triangle - Phil, Carl and Max.
Our Lorraine loved her triangles, didn't she? Actually, as an Alpha male struggle for dominance, this is interesting, especially considering the dynamic that's developing between Carl and Phil.
Phil's the ageing hard man, who's de-morphed from the cerebral dodgy brother, who assumed his more violent brother's personality when Grant left. Grant wore his heart on his sleeve; Phil was someone you learned more about from what he didn't say than from what he did. You had to watch Phil, observe him.
His two Achilles heels are Ben and Sharon - the son he felt he betrayed and the woman who's always been that elusive from him. Yes, of late, Phil's calmed down. He's concentrated on his granddaughter, and he's now living alone. His mother has left, his brother lives abroad, the woman he loves has let him down in her addiction crisis. His son is a murderer, serving time in prison. Phil's content at the moment - not happy, but content - to plod along, living on his past laurels, whilst outwardly playing Grandad Phil.
Carl's the upstart. He's subtly violent, sometimes charming, sometimes frightening, but always unfailingly polite. Like Phil, he's got a woman, who's always managed to evade his final touch, and now she's married to another man. Like Phil, he's the older and more cerebral brother of a younger, more violent sibling. Their mother is a hard-edged battle-axe, whom Carl is at pains to please, and their father appeared to be a weak man.
A mirror-image of the Mitchell dynamic, Carl is, roughly, the same age as Phil when he appeared on the Square.
A rising hard man? We'll see. Carl seemed to tip the wink to Phil tonight with a modicum of respect, when Phil stood up to his presumption. I liked this dynamic, and I know it's leading to the build up of the dominant September storyline, centering around Phil's crash and Carl's manipulation of events afterward. But the performances tonight were down to, arguably, the two best actors in the show at the moment, Steve McFadden and Daniel Coonan.
A passing of the torch? Well, maybe. We'll have to see.
The third part of the dynamic, played by another strong actor in the show, Jake Wood, is Max Branning. Quite honestly, the idea of Max being Top Dog in Walford is risible. Top horny dog, maybe, but Max Branning was never a force to be reckoned with in Walford. That's because the Brannings, as a whole, are losers. Booted and suited, they look the part of respectable Middle Class adherents; they're not. They're white trash.
They're selfish, entitled, incestuous bullies and hypocrites. Max is a serial adulterer, who fucking bows to the will of his daughters, for fuck's sake. He's been buried alive by a wife and mown down. He's been beaten up by his own brother and bankrupted in an attempt to scam Peggy Mitchell. He is a loser, a poor attempt at an emulation of Den Watts without the charisma or the wile to get out of a sticky situation. He always wants what he can't have, but the minute that's out of sight, he settles for what he's got. He couldn't have Stacey so he settled for Tanya, couldn't have Tanya so he settles for Kirsty, who's wanted by Carl and with whom she has infinitely more chemistry.
As unlikeable as Max may be, he's damned watchable.
In this respect, September is shaping up nicely.
The Creature from the Black Lagoon.
One thing worried me at the beginning of tonight's episode, and that was wondering if Phil really were spooked by Shirley's blackmail threats.
I needn't have worried, because he wasn't.
But she's truly, truly vile and consumed by bitterness and jealousy. She's totally vindictive, and this has nothing to do with Heather, and everything to do with the fact that Phil doesn't love her, a fact which she has always known, but only now is able to vocalise.
Phil isn't giving her money because he's afraid of what she knows about him. He's giving her money because she's a nuisance.
You said you were skint and now you've got money.
A grand. Shirley asked him to think of a figure he thought she was worth and treble it. Well, by that first down-payment, her initial worth was approximately £333.33. That's the bargain end of the market. And by the end of the episode, the additional two grand was slapped down in derision at the emptiness of her threat.
As Phil says, she has nothing on him. More than a year has passed since Ben confessed. Shirley had a prime moment when she could have told the police how Phil knew about Ben's involvement and how he sought to cover it up. She didn't. She lied for Phil and betrayed Heather. She was even reluctant, ultimately, to forfeit the murder weapon as evidence. That had to be coerced from her.
At this moment in time, she has no proof, just her word against Phil's; and the police not only would have laughed at her confession, they may very well have charged her with perverting the course of justice as well.
At the beginning of tonight's piece, I was seriously worried about Phil Mitchell being dictated to by a drunken, bitter and twisted old hag, who seemed to be calling the shots. I needn't have been. At the end, Phil just enhanced Shirley's insignificance and irrelevance as long as she clings to her revenge motif, not for Heather, but for the simple fact that Phil Mitchell doesn't and never has loved her.
That's what this is all about, and the Shirley-shippers can suck it ...
Arguably, one of the best scenes in tonight's narrative, was the scene between Jean and Shirley. Jean annoys me at the best of times, and I felt that her friendship with Shirley was just another contrivance of Shirley using an unfortunate person as her fool foil. Jean, put succinctly, was Skinny Heather.
Tonight, she finally saw Shirley for the mean, vile and self-pitying person she was and repudiated her. Like Denise, Shirley's only other remaining friend, she interpreted Phil's paying Shirley's rent as evidence that he, perhaps, still cared; and when Shirley assured her that he didn't - Shirley doesn't do pity, remember, except to pity herself. Then, Jean interprets Shirley's angst as the fact that Shirl, herself, hasn't got over Phil's rejection.
Jean can be astute sometimes, but then, the madness of fools often hits a raw nerve. Seeking to comfort her, Jean assures Shirley that one day she would meet someone whom she'd love and who would make her forget all about Phil, and she innocently used her budding relationship with Ollie as proof that love comes to everyone and one should never give up hope.
Shirley: 'E'll leave ya. You know that, Jean? 'E'll leave ya. They all do. They say the fings you want to 'ear and then they walk the opposite way.
Men abandoning women. Really, Shirl? What about Kevin then? Tell us about that one. You know, Kevin, the one man who did ,marry you. He married you for love, took you back after you catted - read that katted - about on various one night stands, returning not once, but twice, pregnant by a man whose name you couldn't even remember, much less his face. He took those two children, in addition to the disabled one you gave him and raised them as if he were his own.
This was after you walked out, Shirl. After you left him. Walked out of the house one day and left three children under the age of six, one disabled and one just an infant, and didn't look back. You went back to Heather and used her as a crutch until the next loser came along. But you never went back. Ever. Only after Kevin had done all the hard work and raised the kids, and when you found out James had died, you didn't bat an eyelid. You cried more at Heather's death, and that was more because you felt supremely guilty for having repudiated her the night before her wedding than for actual grief. Indeed, you cried more because Phil dumped you than you did at the death of your own son.
So spare us the self-pitying shit about men abandoning you, Shirley; because that's your karma.
As long as Shirley remains in Walford, she'll obsess about Phil, and if that's the case, the character needs to move on, or crawl back into the woodwork and fester.
The Bad Build-Up - Teenaged Kicks.
The Branning Girls: Seriously Bad Lauren and Seriously Fat Abi
Yet another milestone in the spiritual redemption of ...
THE. WORST. ACTRESS. EVER. TO. APPEAR. IN. EASTENDERS.
Poor pitiful Lauren. We're meant to feel sorry for her now, you know. We're meant to turn that proverbial leaf with her and take her to our hearts.
Pardon me, but is there some sort of beauty contest going on behind the scenes at EastEnders? Because I lost count of the number of close-ups Jossa, Keirston Wareing, Danielle Harold (who was seriously tango'd) and Mimi Keen got.
They love to hone the camera in on Jossa and she loves it - so much that if it isn't on her, she can be spied actively seeking it. As someone said on one forum, as an actress, she hasn't grown or learned from her almost two years into the programme, nor has the character even progressed.
Suddenly, Kirsty's become the understanding mother that Tanya never was. Imagine the confessional (how many confessionals has she had now anyway?) scene she had with Kirsty, how it would have transpired, had Tanya been there.
Awwwwwww, Lauren, dahlin ..... none o'vis is your fault, babe. Look-I'll-tell-ya-wha'-we'll-do-we'll-get-a-pizza-an-a-DVD-an'-'ave-a-girlie-night-in. (Breathless) I'll even do yer toenails. 'Member how ya used ter like me doin' yer toenails. Ven, we can crack open a bottle o'bubbly in the fridge ...
(Lauren) But mum, I can't drink. It might kill me.
(Tanya) Oh, doan worry 'bout vat. Vat's somefink all the doctors say. We'll just have a glass each. Well, I might have two. Or three. Maybe four.
Kirsty's no-nonsense maternal.
Right. I want a cuppa tea, and I want details.
And then, Kirsty the counsellor, asks Lauren to identify her goals, which proves, upon revelation, that Lauren hasn't moved outside her comfort bubble, because whilst her goals concern other people, they do so only in the way it might reflect on Lauren.
There was an instance, in the office of Butcher's Joints with Billy, when he'd succeeded in talking Billy into convincing Lola to go on the fated holiday, that I thought for a moment Sam was going to shuck'n jive.
And that image is sorta kinda distasteful and stereotypical, but then Ava the Rava, Sam the Sham and Dexter are indeed stereotypical, almost offensively so.
One thing Sam did do tonight, and that was, again, down to writer inconsistency: he put paid to the narrative of Ava being a young and foolish partygirl who lived in a squat and got pregnant. Sam acknowledged that he wasn't that young when he became a father, although he did shirk the responsibility necessary. You have to ask what the hell a 28 year-old teacher and a builder of the same age were doing living in a squat in Croydon?
As well, doesn't Sam have some sort of building job or is he keeping the pavement warm for Ava as she'll obviously be on Magic Negro patrol when school starts, because she's rarely seen in a classroom.
The pseudo-comic "bonding" scene between Sam and Dexter in the pub was butt-clinchingly pukeworthy. And, really, Sam, you shouldn't be paying off money your spoiled little sprog wastes. He needs a smack.
Good episode, shame about the on-going teen centricity. Next week's Teen Week is going to be hellacious. It's time EastEnders got back to its core audience. I hope DTC appreciates that.
Instead of one recogniseable build-up tonight, we get two.
We also got another big autumn build-up today with the news that Bianca is getting a love interest - some bald comic of whom I've never heard, who looks like something from Right Said Fred.
If it ain't broke, don't fix it; and Ricky and Bianca weren't broken. Until, by various means and misinformation, Bryan Kirkwood (it's that man again!) managed to do so.
You know for years, after Anne Kirkbride got cancer, Ken and Deirdre were kept apart, and when she returned, she had a ridiculous Kidneygate romance with a Moroccan toyboy, whilst Ken was involved with a much younger woman who'd had his child. After being scammed by a conman and imprisoned, some producer actually figured out that Ken and Deirdre worked best together, and not with anyone else. This was ever thus with Pauline and Arthur.
Frank and Pat worked a treat. Frank and Peggy, not so much. Grant and Sharon were iconic; Grant and Tiffany were tragic; Sharon and Dennis were just ... meh.
Ricky and Bianca ... yes. Who can ever forget the mellifluous sound of Rick-AYYYYYYYYY!?
Terry and Bianca ... no, not the same thing at all. Besides, the character is supposed to have kids - more teenagers and probably an ex-wife somewhere. This, we don't need.
Kudos to DTC for trying and for hitting the ground running; but maybe he'd get bigger kudos if he'd just realise that just maybe Bianca's reached her sell-by date.
The Beginning of the Big Build-Up.
Our Lorraine loved her triangles, didn't she? Actually, as an Alpha male struggle for dominance, this is interesting, especially considering the dynamic that's developing between Carl and Phil.
Phil's the ageing hard man, who's de-morphed from the cerebral dodgy brother, who assumed his more violent brother's personality when Grant left. Grant wore his heart on his sleeve; Phil was someone you learned more about from what he didn't say than from what he did. You had to watch Phil, observe him.
His two Achilles heels are Ben and Sharon - the son he felt he betrayed and the woman who's always been that elusive from him. Yes, of late, Phil's calmed down. He's concentrated on his granddaughter, and he's now living alone. His mother has left, his brother lives abroad, the woman he loves has let him down in her addiction crisis. His son is a murderer, serving time in prison. Phil's content at the moment - not happy, but content - to plod along, living on his past laurels, whilst outwardly playing Grandad Phil.
Carl's the upstart. He's subtly violent, sometimes charming, sometimes frightening, but always unfailingly polite. Like Phil, he's got a woman, who's always managed to evade his final touch, and now she's married to another man. Like Phil, he's the older and more cerebral brother of a younger, more violent sibling. Their mother is a hard-edged battle-axe, whom Carl is at pains to please, and their father appeared to be a weak man.
A mirror-image of the Mitchell dynamic, Carl is, roughly, the same age as Phil when he appeared on the Square.
A rising hard man? We'll see. Carl seemed to tip the wink to Phil tonight with a modicum of respect, when Phil stood up to his presumption. I liked this dynamic, and I know it's leading to the build up of the dominant September storyline, centering around Phil's crash and Carl's manipulation of events afterward. But the performances tonight were down to, arguably, the two best actors in the show at the moment, Steve McFadden and Daniel Coonan.
A passing of the torch? Well, maybe. We'll have to see.
The third part of the dynamic, played by another strong actor in the show, Jake Wood, is Max Branning. Quite honestly, the idea of Max being Top Dog in Walford is risible. Top horny dog, maybe, but Max Branning was never a force to be reckoned with in Walford. That's because the Brannings, as a whole, are losers. Booted and suited, they look the part of respectable Middle Class adherents; they're not. They're white trash.
They're selfish, entitled, incestuous bullies and hypocrites. Max is a serial adulterer, who fucking bows to the will of his daughters, for fuck's sake. He's been buried alive by a wife and mown down. He's been beaten up by his own brother and bankrupted in an attempt to scam Peggy Mitchell. He is a loser, a poor attempt at an emulation of Den Watts without the charisma or the wile to get out of a sticky situation. He always wants what he can't have, but the minute that's out of sight, he settles for what he's got. He couldn't have Stacey so he settled for Tanya, couldn't have Tanya so he settles for Kirsty, who's wanted by Carl and with whom she has infinitely more chemistry.
As unlikeable as Max may be, he's damned watchable.
In this respect, September is shaping up nicely.
The Creature from the Black Lagoon.
One thing worried me at the beginning of tonight's episode, and that was wondering if Phil really were spooked by Shirley's blackmail threats.
I needn't have worried, because he wasn't.
But she's truly, truly vile and consumed by bitterness and jealousy. She's totally vindictive, and this has nothing to do with Heather, and everything to do with the fact that Phil doesn't love her, a fact which she has always known, but only now is able to vocalise.
Phil isn't giving her money because he's afraid of what she knows about him. He's giving her money because she's a nuisance.
You said you were skint and now you've got money.
A grand. Shirley asked him to think of a figure he thought she was worth and treble it. Well, by that first down-payment, her initial worth was approximately £333.33. That's the bargain end of the market. And by the end of the episode, the additional two grand was slapped down in derision at the emptiness of her threat.
As Phil says, she has nothing on him. More than a year has passed since Ben confessed. Shirley had a prime moment when she could have told the police how Phil knew about Ben's involvement and how he sought to cover it up. She didn't. She lied for Phil and betrayed Heather. She was even reluctant, ultimately, to forfeit the murder weapon as evidence. That had to be coerced from her.
At this moment in time, she has no proof, just her word against Phil's; and the police not only would have laughed at her confession, they may very well have charged her with perverting the course of justice as well.
At the beginning of tonight's piece, I was seriously worried about Phil Mitchell being dictated to by a drunken, bitter and twisted old hag, who seemed to be calling the shots. I needn't have been. At the end, Phil just enhanced Shirley's insignificance and irrelevance as long as she clings to her revenge motif, not for Heather, but for the simple fact that Phil Mitchell doesn't and never has loved her.
That's what this is all about, and the Shirley-shippers can suck it ...
Arguably, one of the best scenes in tonight's narrative, was the scene between Jean and Shirley. Jean annoys me at the best of times, and I felt that her friendship with Shirley was just another contrivance of Shirley using an unfortunate person as her fool foil. Jean, put succinctly, was Skinny Heather.
Tonight, she finally saw Shirley for the mean, vile and self-pitying person she was and repudiated her. Like Denise, Shirley's only other remaining friend, she interpreted Phil's paying Shirley's rent as evidence that he, perhaps, still cared; and when Shirley assured her that he didn't - Shirley doesn't do pity, remember, except to pity herself. Then, Jean interprets Shirley's angst as the fact that Shirl, herself, hasn't got over Phil's rejection.
Jean can be astute sometimes, but then, the madness of fools often hits a raw nerve. Seeking to comfort her, Jean assures Shirley that one day she would meet someone whom she'd love and who would make her forget all about Phil, and she innocently used her budding relationship with Ollie as proof that love comes to everyone and one should never give up hope.
Shirley: 'E'll leave ya. You know that, Jean? 'E'll leave ya. They all do. They say the fings you want to 'ear and then they walk the opposite way.
Men abandoning women. Really, Shirl? What about Kevin then? Tell us about that one. You know, Kevin, the one man who did ,marry you. He married you for love, took you back after you catted - read that katted - about on various one night stands, returning not once, but twice, pregnant by a man whose name you couldn't even remember, much less his face. He took those two children, in addition to the disabled one you gave him and raised them as if he were his own.
This was after you walked out, Shirl. After you left him. Walked out of the house one day and left three children under the age of six, one disabled and one just an infant, and didn't look back. You went back to Heather and used her as a crutch until the next loser came along. But you never went back. Ever. Only after Kevin had done all the hard work and raised the kids, and when you found out James had died, you didn't bat an eyelid. You cried more at Heather's death, and that was more because you felt supremely guilty for having repudiated her the night before her wedding than for actual grief. Indeed, you cried more because Phil dumped you than you did at the death of your own son.
So spare us the self-pitying shit about men abandoning you, Shirley; because that's your karma.
As long as Shirley remains in Walford, she'll obsess about Phil, and if that's the case, the character needs to move on, or crawl back into the woodwork and fester.
The Bad Build-Up - Teenaged Kicks.
The Branning Girls: Seriously Bad Lauren and Seriously Fat Abi
Yet another milestone in the spiritual redemption of ...
THE. WORST. ACTRESS. EVER. TO. APPEAR. IN. EASTENDERS.
Pardon me, but is there some sort of beauty contest going on behind the scenes at EastEnders? Because I lost count of the number of close-ups Jossa, Keirston Wareing, Danielle Harold (who was seriously tango'd) and Mimi Keen got.
They love to hone the camera in on Jossa and she loves it - so much that if it isn't on her, she can be spied actively seeking it. As someone said on one forum, as an actress, she hasn't grown or learned from her almost two years into the programme, nor has the character even progressed.
Suddenly, Kirsty's become the understanding mother that Tanya never was. Imagine the confessional (how many confessionals has she had now anyway?) scene she had with Kirsty, how it would have transpired, had Tanya been there.
Awwwwwww, Lauren, dahlin ..... none o'vis is your fault, babe. Look-I'll-tell-ya-wha'-we'll-do-we'll-get-a-pizza-an-a-DVD-an'-'ave-a-girlie-night-in. (Breathless) I'll even do yer toenails. 'Member how ya used ter like me doin' yer toenails. Ven, we can crack open a bottle o'bubbly in the fridge ...
(Lauren) But mum, I can't drink. It might kill me.
(Tanya) Oh, doan worry 'bout vat. Vat's somefink all the doctors say. We'll just have a glass each. Well, I might have two. Or three. Maybe four.
Kirsty's no-nonsense maternal.
Right. I want a cuppa tea, and I want details.
And then, Kirsty the counsellor, asks Lauren to identify her goals, which proves, upon revelation, that Lauren hasn't moved outside her comfort bubble, because whilst her goals concern other people, they do so only in the way it might reflect on Lauren.
- She wants "the best" for Abi (because it would exonerate her from the portion of blame she shares for Abi failing her exam).
- She wants Max to feel proud of her (again, so she can feel better about herself)
- She wants to do all of this to show one on Joey (as in, maybe he'll love her again).
I'm pigshit sick of hearing her whine about Joey. Her goals should be about getting better and conquering her alcoholism to achieve her own goasl for herself and not for anyone else as a roundabout way of exonerating her bad behaviour.
As for Abi, Abi is seriously, and I mean seriously, getting fat. She's not plump, and that's not baby fat. She is Abi the Dough-Faced Girl. She has a moon-face with a noticeable double-chin and an enormous arse and thighs. I am not being mean, but Lorna Fitzgerald is edging towards obesity.
As for Abi's failure, it's not entirely Lauren's fault, if you think of the number of times Abi bunked off classes to hang out with Jay or Lola. But, like Lauren, she's apportioning the blame to someone else. I don't understand why she can't re-sit her exams, because Lauren's end result amounted to an even longer path to her ultimate goal of becoming a vet. Taking more AS courses in different subjects, getting her A2's and going to a university and obtaining a degree in another subject, before re-training in post-graduate education as a vet.
Once again, Max the man, gets shown up by the female members of his family, shouting the odds about Abi's failure. He's right in a way, to blame her association with Jay, who's only ever paid lip service to her ambition (as we'll see next week), and if you recall, Jay didn't once suggest that Abi continue down the education path. Yet Daddy Dearest gets put in his place, once again.
That said, I'm glad someone's remembered the year-old arrangement between Max and Phil about Phil "procuring" late model cars (probably stolen ones) and Max selling them. Phil's anxious for cash, but I can't understand why, because it's not for Shirley.
Anyway, Abi's snort and giggle were worse tonight, and I seriously hope she leaves Walford to pursue her studies, and takes Lauren with her.
Lo-lo-lololola.
I guess the lyrics could really apply to Shirley, Cora, Kim, Kat or Sharon, but still it's a nice song, and the title fits.
I'm not a big fan, but of all the youngsters, she's easily the most talented and most natural actress - and she's turned into a paragon of positivity. Is she the Michelle of her age? Who knows? Actually, no, because no one can approach that icon, but she's become responsible, she's holding down a job and she's approaching motherhood with a more mature attitude. It took some doing, and some of it was unbelieveable, but if there's one positive ingenue on the show, it's Lola.
I even warmed to Lucy defending her tonight when that scurrilous little dipshit Cindy the Greek, panned the fact that Lucy appeared to be hanging out with teen mums now. (Well, Cindy the Greek, first of all, your mum was no stranger to amorality, herself, passing her first child off as the son of someone he wasn't and then having you in prison, or do you know about her attempted murder of Ian? And, actually Cindy, Lucy's not hanging out with teen mums; instead, she's hanging out with attempted murderers and former prostitutes).
I hope this attitude isn't a foreshadowing of Cindy the Greek becoming a gymslip mum. God forbid that!
Cindy the Greek.
Someone on Walford Web Bullyboi Emporium reckons this girl could be "the driving force" behind the Beale family.
I don't think so.
She's not even a Beale, and the wild hair and very strongly masculine-featured face bother me. Once again, another teenaged wildchild, we don't need, especially since Ian Beale has been adamant about never ever raising someone else's child again. He felt so strongly about that that he kicked Laura Beale, Bobby's mother out of the house on Christmas Day when he thought she was pregnant by someone else.
Ian wants what's his, not another man's leavings (his words about Bobby at the time of Laura's pregnancy).
She's yet another sneaky kid, and you could tell by her exaggerated features that she was going to hone in and horne in on the prospective *giggle-snort8* holiday.
Jay.
Mate, I'd be seriously worried that Abi didn't want to go on holiday with just you alone. Man up and dump the dough-girl.
Sanford and Son.
Dexter is a seriously spoiled child and he needs a fucking smack. Maybe when Sam the Sham's been around long enough, he'll administer it, because his behaviour when his boss told him he wouldn't be able to have a holiday because of a situation at work, he acted out in the most juvenile way. But this is what he's always done, whenever he hasn't got his way - stomp off, shout fast and unintelligibly and act like Gumby on Acid.
As for Sam the Sham, tonight Cornell S John was not Paul Winfield...
There was an instance, in the office of Butcher's Joints with Billy, when he'd succeeded in talking Billy into convincing Lola to go on the fated holiday, that I thought for a moment Sam was going to shuck'n jive.
And that image is sorta kinda distasteful and stereotypical, but then Ava the Rava, Sam the Sham and Dexter are indeed stereotypical, almost offensively so.
One thing Sam did do tonight, and that was, again, down to writer inconsistency: he put paid to the narrative of Ava being a young and foolish partygirl who lived in a squat and got pregnant. Sam acknowledged that he wasn't that young when he became a father, although he did shirk the responsibility necessary. You have to ask what the hell a 28 year-old teacher and a builder of the same age were doing living in a squat in Croydon?
As well, doesn't Sam have some sort of building job or is he keeping the pavement warm for Ava as she'll obviously be on Magic Negro patrol when school starts, because she's rarely seen in a classroom.
The pseudo-comic "bonding" scene between Sam and Dexter in the pub was butt-clinchingly pukeworthy. And, really, Sam, you shouldn't be paying off money your spoiled little sprog wastes. He needs a smack.
Good episode, shame about the on-going teen centricity. Next week's Teen Week is going to be hellacious. It's time EastEnders got back to its core audience. I hope DTC appreciates that.
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