Just to get us all in the mood, here's a song celebrating the great Walford love affair that had absolutely nothing to do with love. Ladies and gentlemen, for Phil, for Shirley ... and for Mona ...
Definitely a better quality episode, and definitely a filler, but not as good as last night's. It's one of those episodes made to fill up space, but it definitely had more moments than the fillers of Kirkwood and Beedles did.
There should be another song which could have been a theme for tonight's episode. It has to do with Phil and how everyone sees him ...
Who's afraid of the big bad wolf?
Well, it seems a lot of people are.
Jay's sleeping rough and ostracised by most of the Square. I feel dreadfully sorry for Jay, but facts are facts, and Jay did cover up a murder. Was he forced to do so? Yes, we saw those episodes where he sought refuge with the Brannings, but we also heard Jay admit to covering up the murder because he genuinely felt for Ben and considered him his brother. And Jay is still covering for Phil.
How different would everyone's attitude have been had Jay blurted out that Phil had coerced him into covering up for Ben? And people would do well to remember that Phil's first instinct, when finding Ben with Heather's body, was to call the police. It wasn't until Ben panicked at the thought of going back to prison and being tried as an adult that he got over his attitude toward screwing Phil and begged him for help. Sharon was right when Phil told her the full of it, which is what he did - Phil acted like a parent - a flawed parent, yes; and a responsible parent would have shopped their kid to the police for that; but Phil had only just emerged from prison, himself. Phil acted like a Mitchell parent, and that's a species with whom Sharon is very familiar.
Patrick proved yet again why it may be mete to dispense with the "matriarch" malarkey for the moment and stick with Patrick the Patriarch of the Square. The shunning of Jay resonates with Patrick, who lived through the worst of racist times in this country. He remembers what it was liked to be shunned and ignored, treated like dirt; and he's not going to judge Jay. He was right to put Cora in her place.
Cora, the matriarch? The go-to woman in the Square? Cora's reaction was akin to that of Pauline Fowler or Peggy Mitchell or even early Dot, and I'm glad she got put in her place.
Incongruous, however, was Katshit's faux concern.
Please, don't bother with even making this character complex or trying to make us like her. I could actually understand Alfie's reluctance. Heather was a regular at their pub, she cleaned for them and Alfie liked her. I won't credit Kat with liking Heather because her head was so far up her own arse. But I thought her sneering reaction to Alfie's concern for Ian last week at odds with her sudden worry about Jay, who covered up the murder of an innocent woman for months, eating from rubbish bins. Another thing Alfie was undoubtedly thinking about, and that's the fact that Phil Mitchell owns their livelihood. You simply don't bite the hand that feeds you.
This is going to be very interesting, however, with Jay, Shirley and Sharon all resident at the B and B.
Blind-sider of the night goes to Shirley, and Linda Henry goes from strength to strength in this storyline. Shirley is shell-shocked. She's like a domestic abuse victim, who clings to her abuser because he represents security and she knows nothing else. It's as though she were almost suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.
Of course, people are going to question whether or not she knew what Ben did, what Jay concealed. The longer she remains in the Mitchell house, the more their dirt is going to stick to her. Andrew was right: when she tried in vain to remove the graffiti'd MURDERERS scrawled on the Mitchell wall, it looked to the public as if she were defending them.
Since Shirl's allied herself with the Mitchells, she enjoyed the trappings of their power and notoreity and never hesitated to flex her muscles. At times, she even abandoned Heather; in truth, during Heather's last days, when it looked as though Phil were going to prison for a long time, she did her utmost to sabotage Heather's relationship with Andrew, even bullying her and forcing her to choose between him and her on the last night of her life.
The best scene of the night, undoubtedly, was the brief scene when Denise discovered Shirley hidden away in the Minute Mart, listening to Max, Alfie and Jack gossiping about the deed and wondering whether Shirley had known all along that they'd done it. Rather than participate, Denise defended her, and later when she shut the shop for a talk with Shirl, that was one of the most poignant scenes in recent years on the programme.
If we're talking about lost souls, Shirl is definitely one, and it's of her own making. She's clinging to the only security she's known in recent years - not leaving the Mitchell home because (in her view) she has no place to go. That was always the truth when she was with Phil; as long as she was in his good graces, she had a home. That's why she swallowed her pride and accepted his admission that he couldn't be faithful. She has nowhere now, and without Heather, she has no one - or had no one, until Denise invited her to live at the B and B. So insecure was Shirley, she even gave the pithy excuse of not wanting to leave her family, and kudos to Denise for reminding her in no uncertain terms that the Mitchells were not and had never been her family.
It's also obvious that Roxy, Billy and big-mouth Lola are all afraid of Phil's big bad wolf. i couldn't understand Roxy's snide look at Jay sleeping rough. Roxy has a moral conscience. You can't tell me that she would condone living under the same roof with someone who'd concealed a murder, someone who's son (the murderer) was responsible for a near-fatal accident involving her own child?
Lola was just stupid and a plot device, whose line about the baby hating to wake up alone just served to provide Shirley with her final sucker punch that floored Phil - the fact that Phil, late for a lunch he had ordained, had allowed George to remain for 90 minutes alone in Heather's flat with Heather's corpse. Lola's contrived line allowed Shirley to make an observation when Phil protested his love for her - that what they had wasn't love. Love was pure and positive. It's actually what she felt for Heather (well, no, it wasn't actually; because Shirley took Heather's friendship as it suited her when it suited her and on her terms), but at least she now realises concretely what's niggled her all along - that Phil doesn't love her, and that she really shouldn't love Phil either.
Does Phil love Shirley? No. I think he's fond of her, and I think he certainly feels immense guilt at this ultimate deception; and I think he wants them to stay together in order that he might try and make something up to her; but as long as he's going to fight for Ben, then his relationship with Shirley doesn't stand a chance. In retrospect, he feels the same way toward Sharon, but he's too caught up in his current situation to concentrate on that. If Ben hadn't killed Heather and things were near normal in the Mitchell abode, Phil would be spending ever available minute with Sharon and bonding with Dennis Jnr., assauging his guilt.
Note to Lorraine Newman and Deborah Sathe: Nix the Mitchell bunfests. They're boring, predictable and trite. The idea that Phil was going for a show of solidarity tonight with Peggy's sure-fire remedy - a fairmly dinner, which always ends in disaster. I mean, who can forget this:-
Today we got the Skagend Mitchells, consisting of Shirley, who's just had the wool removed from her eyes, the two runts of the litter (Billy and Roxy) and someone who didn't even know she was part of the clan until last year and still doesn't know how to eat at a table ... but then, the Mitchells don't eat at a proper dining room table. Instead, they eat at a pool table, just like another famous family. The Mitchells, with their inbreeding et al, really are the Clampetts of Walford:-
Andrew has love handles and moobs. He also sweats profusely and cannot act. Axe, please.
Meanwhile back at the Walford Branch of the Mouth-Breathers' Association, Ian is trying to attract a vicious, lying little toerag of a stick insect, who thinks her shit doesn't smell. Another axe is required.
And now, for Sharon. Once again, Sharon worked best with Ian and Phil, obviously because the actress has known and has worked with Steve McFadden and Adam Woodyatt for years. The writing was good here. Watching the dynamic between her and Ian looked so easy and comfortable. Even DamienDen was bearable tonight. Clock that Ian told Sharon he'd signed everything over to Lucy. I know there will be some shallow souls wondering why she didn't stamp her foot, heave her bosom and throw a hissyfit. Trust me - that's not Sharon. Sharon will file this information away, until Lollygag and Pinocchio the Penis slip up (and they will) and then she'll make her move.
Once again, Letitia Dean and Steve McFadden ooze chemistry when they're on screen together, and they know it. Once again, that comes from their high regard for each other and their easy ability about their characters. Sharon always brings out the soft side of Phil, and it didn't take long before Phil was telling Sharon everything about knowing Ben had killed Heather and how he'd covered it up. He even expressed his remorse over the way this whole thing had affected Shirley. Notice that Sharon didn't judge. No matter how much Phil says he loves Shirley, it's obvious he truly loves Sharon; and we know he's harbouring a secret from her as well.
Two weird scenes with Sharon tonight as well - the scene where Kim is playing with her wedding dress and she and Denise have a laugh about it, before Sharon comes high and mighty about the cleanliness in her room, before Denise rejoinders about wanting a deposit. The irony of that situation is that, unbeknownst to both of them (well, Sharon at least), both women lost their husbands and Phil Mitchell was indirectly involved. I'd really like to see a friendship between Denise and Sharon develop - far more than this shitty faux friendship that's about to develop with Tanya, arguably the shallowest character in the programme.
Then there was the scene with Janine. I've watched Eastenders since Day One. I remember Sharon babysitting for Janine when Janine was a young child. Regularly. She lived with Janine's stepbrother, Simon, for awhile. Also, Janine was very much a part of Walford when Sharon was around the last time. Janine had been on the Square for two years when Sharon arrived in 2001, and she left in 2004; so Janine would certainly have known who Sharon was. Once again, this was a missed opportunity, and even moreso now that Charlie Brooks's sabbatical is impending. Janine and Sharon have so much in common - growing up in the Vic, daughters of Walford icons, daddy issues, child issues ... Bad piece of scripting there.
And finally, the supefluous scene in the kebab shop, with Alfie giving Fatboy inane advice about how to deal with Nico's perceived bullying. The entire scene was bad, bad and very much the product of Lauren Klee. Alfie shouldn't be played for the fool at the moment; he should be a sympathetic figure considering the slut of a wife he's got and what she's about to do to him.
Fatboy should be dropped as a character, along with the gaggle of useless youth, two of whom were sat at the table in the kebab shop. It's also time for Newman to consider some of the lesser talents in her writing room as well.
Definitely a better quality episode, and definitely a filler, but not as good as last night's. It's one of those episodes made to fill up space, but it definitely had more moments than the fillers of Kirkwood and Beedles did.
There should be another song which could have been a theme for tonight's episode. It has to do with Phil and how everyone sees him ...
Who's afraid of the big bad wolf?
Well, it seems a lot of people are.
Jay's sleeping rough and ostracised by most of the Square. I feel dreadfully sorry for Jay, but facts are facts, and Jay did cover up a murder. Was he forced to do so? Yes, we saw those episodes where he sought refuge with the Brannings, but we also heard Jay admit to covering up the murder because he genuinely felt for Ben and considered him his brother. And Jay is still covering for Phil.
How different would everyone's attitude have been had Jay blurted out that Phil had coerced him into covering up for Ben? And people would do well to remember that Phil's first instinct, when finding Ben with Heather's body, was to call the police. It wasn't until Ben panicked at the thought of going back to prison and being tried as an adult that he got over his attitude toward screwing Phil and begged him for help. Sharon was right when Phil told her the full of it, which is what he did - Phil acted like a parent - a flawed parent, yes; and a responsible parent would have shopped their kid to the police for that; but Phil had only just emerged from prison, himself. Phil acted like a Mitchell parent, and that's a species with whom Sharon is very familiar.
Patrick proved yet again why it may be mete to dispense with the "matriarch" malarkey for the moment and stick with Patrick the Patriarch of the Square. The shunning of Jay resonates with Patrick, who lived through the worst of racist times in this country. He remembers what it was liked to be shunned and ignored, treated like dirt; and he's not going to judge Jay. He was right to put Cora in her place.
Cora, the matriarch? The go-to woman in the Square? Cora's reaction was akin to that of Pauline Fowler or Peggy Mitchell or even early Dot, and I'm glad she got put in her place.
Incongruous, however, was Katshit's faux concern.
Please, don't bother with even making this character complex or trying to make us like her. I could actually understand Alfie's reluctance. Heather was a regular at their pub, she cleaned for them and Alfie liked her. I won't credit Kat with liking Heather because her head was so far up her own arse. But I thought her sneering reaction to Alfie's concern for Ian last week at odds with her sudden worry about Jay, who covered up the murder of an innocent woman for months, eating from rubbish bins. Another thing Alfie was undoubtedly thinking about, and that's the fact that Phil Mitchell owns their livelihood. You simply don't bite the hand that feeds you.
This is going to be very interesting, however, with Jay, Shirley and Sharon all resident at the B and B.
Blind-sider of the night goes to Shirley, and Linda Henry goes from strength to strength in this storyline. Shirley is shell-shocked. She's like a domestic abuse victim, who clings to her abuser because he represents security and she knows nothing else. It's as though she were almost suffering from Stockholm Syndrome.
Of course, people are going to question whether or not she knew what Ben did, what Jay concealed. The longer she remains in the Mitchell house, the more their dirt is going to stick to her. Andrew was right: when she tried in vain to remove the graffiti'd MURDERERS scrawled on the Mitchell wall, it looked to the public as if she were defending them.
Since Shirl's allied herself with the Mitchells, she enjoyed the trappings of their power and notoreity and never hesitated to flex her muscles. At times, she even abandoned Heather; in truth, during Heather's last days, when it looked as though Phil were going to prison for a long time, she did her utmost to sabotage Heather's relationship with Andrew, even bullying her and forcing her to choose between him and her on the last night of her life.
The best scene of the night, undoubtedly, was the brief scene when Denise discovered Shirley hidden away in the Minute Mart, listening to Max, Alfie and Jack gossiping about the deed and wondering whether Shirley had known all along that they'd done it. Rather than participate, Denise defended her, and later when she shut the shop for a talk with Shirl, that was one of the most poignant scenes in recent years on the programme.
If we're talking about lost souls, Shirl is definitely one, and it's of her own making. She's clinging to the only security she's known in recent years - not leaving the Mitchell home because (in her view) she has no place to go. That was always the truth when she was with Phil; as long as she was in his good graces, she had a home. That's why she swallowed her pride and accepted his admission that he couldn't be faithful. She has nowhere now, and without Heather, she has no one - or had no one, until Denise invited her to live at the B and B. So insecure was Shirley, she even gave the pithy excuse of not wanting to leave her family, and kudos to Denise for reminding her in no uncertain terms that the Mitchells were not and had never been her family.
It's also obvious that Roxy, Billy and big-mouth Lola are all afraid of Phil's big bad wolf. i couldn't understand Roxy's snide look at Jay sleeping rough. Roxy has a moral conscience. You can't tell me that she would condone living under the same roof with someone who'd concealed a murder, someone who's son (the murderer) was responsible for a near-fatal accident involving her own child?
Lola was just stupid and a plot device, whose line about the baby hating to wake up alone just served to provide Shirley with her final sucker punch that floored Phil - the fact that Phil, late for a lunch he had ordained, had allowed George to remain for 90 minutes alone in Heather's flat with Heather's corpse. Lola's contrived line allowed Shirley to make an observation when Phil protested his love for her - that what they had wasn't love. Love was pure and positive. It's actually what she felt for Heather (well, no, it wasn't actually; because Shirley took Heather's friendship as it suited her when it suited her and on her terms), but at least she now realises concretely what's niggled her all along - that Phil doesn't love her, and that she really shouldn't love Phil either.
Does Phil love Shirley? No. I think he's fond of her, and I think he certainly feels immense guilt at this ultimate deception; and I think he wants them to stay together in order that he might try and make something up to her; but as long as he's going to fight for Ben, then his relationship with Shirley doesn't stand a chance. In retrospect, he feels the same way toward Sharon, but he's too caught up in his current situation to concentrate on that. If Ben hadn't killed Heather and things were near normal in the Mitchell abode, Phil would be spending ever available minute with Sharon and bonding with Dennis Jnr., assauging his guilt.
Note to Lorraine Newman and Deborah Sathe: Nix the Mitchell bunfests. They're boring, predictable and trite. The idea that Phil was going for a show of solidarity tonight with Peggy's sure-fire remedy - a fairmly dinner, which always ends in disaster. I mean, who can forget this:-
Today we got the Skagend Mitchells, consisting of Shirley, who's just had the wool removed from her eyes, the two runts of the litter (Billy and Roxy) and someone who didn't even know she was part of the clan until last year and still doesn't know how to eat at a table ... but then, the Mitchells don't eat at a proper dining room table. Instead, they eat at a pool table, just like another famous family. The Mitchells, with their inbreeding et al, really are the Clampetts of Walford:-
Andrew has love handles and moobs. He also sweats profusely and cannot act. Axe, please.
Meanwhile back at the Walford Branch of the Mouth-Breathers' Association, Ian is trying to attract a vicious, lying little toerag of a stick insect, who thinks her shit doesn't smell. Another axe is required.
And now, for Sharon. Once again, Sharon worked best with Ian and Phil, obviously because the actress has known and has worked with Steve McFadden and Adam Woodyatt for years. The writing was good here. Watching the dynamic between her and Ian looked so easy and comfortable. Even DamienDen was bearable tonight. Clock that Ian told Sharon he'd signed everything over to Lucy. I know there will be some shallow souls wondering why she didn't stamp her foot, heave her bosom and throw a hissyfit. Trust me - that's not Sharon. Sharon will file this information away, until Lollygag and Pinocchio the Penis slip up (and they will) and then she'll make her move.
Once again, Letitia Dean and Steve McFadden ooze chemistry when they're on screen together, and they know it. Once again, that comes from their high regard for each other and their easy ability about their characters. Sharon always brings out the soft side of Phil, and it didn't take long before Phil was telling Sharon everything about knowing Ben had killed Heather and how he'd covered it up. He even expressed his remorse over the way this whole thing had affected Shirley. Notice that Sharon didn't judge. No matter how much Phil says he loves Shirley, it's obvious he truly loves Sharon; and we know he's harbouring a secret from her as well.
Two weird scenes with Sharon tonight as well - the scene where Kim is playing with her wedding dress and she and Denise have a laugh about it, before Sharon comes high and mighty about the cleanliness in her room, before Denise rejoinders about wanting a deposit. The irony of that situation is that, unbeknownst to both of them (well, Sharon at least), both women lost their husbands and Phil Mitchell was indirectly involved. I'd really like to see a friendship between Denise and Sharon develop - far more than this shitty faux friendship that's about to develop with Tanya, arguably the shallowest character in the programme.
Then there was the scene with Janine. I've watched Eastenders since Day One. I remember Sharon babysitting for Janine when Janine was a young child. Regularly. She lived with Janine's stepbrother, Simon, for awhile. Also, Janine was very much a part of Walford when Sharon was around the last time. Janine had been on the Square for two years when Sharon arrived in 2001, and she left in 2004; so Janine would certainly have known who Sharon was. Once again, this was a missed opportunity, and even moreso now that Charlie Brooks's sabbatical is impending. Janine and Sharon have so much in common - growing up in the Vic, daughters of Walford icons, daddy issues, child issues ... Bad piece of scripting there.
And finally, the supefluous scene in the kebab shop, with Alfie giving Fatboy inane advice about how to deal with Nico's perceived bullying. The entire scene was bad, bad and very much the product of Lauren Klee. Alfie shouldn't be played for the fool at the moment; he should be a sympathetic figure considering the slut of a wife he's got and what she's about to do to him.
Fatboy should be dropped as a character, along with the gaggle of useless youth, two of whom were sat at the table in the kebab shop. It's also time for Newman to consider some of the lesser talents in her writing room as well.
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