Shaggergate is, without a doubt, one of the worst storylines ever manufactured in Eastenders' history. Seriously, it rivals Kidneygate, starring those charismatic Ferreiras.
Even though I puked at the thought of this whodunnit, because it seemed to want the audience to root for a smelly, old trollop to cheat on her faithful husband, in connivance with this anti-male version of EastEnders, what I enjoy about whodunnits is the exposure it gives to viewers who wouldn't recognise critical thinking it the concept slapped them in the face with a rotten wet fish.
Derek is the shagger.
It was alway only ever going to be Derek.
Think logically.
Affair storylines are usually used as a means by which one character departs a series. A couple splits and one leaves - otherwise, you have the interminable kabuki theatre of a will-they-won't-they return. Until Diederick Santer unwisely broke the mould of splitting couples so one could leave with Stax, this was the norm.
Common sense and long years of watching soaps would tell me that Shaggergate would mean the ultimate humiliation and departure of Kat. The character hasn't worked at all since her return - due, primarily, to pisspoor writing, but also to the fact that the actress hasn't quite got enough of a grip this time on a character she invented, and her excessive use of botox didn't aid in her performance.
However, since EastEnders made Kat, and EastEnders destroyed her for no real reason other than the then-producer's whim, I think TPTB are going to give it one last go at repairing her character; and since Shane Richie has repeatedly said that Kat was meant to be with Alfie or with no one, I think it's safe to surmise that somehow they intend, at least, to try to repair the damage to the couple.
I have always believed that this storyline was only ever meant to implode upon as few characters as possible - namely, Alfie and Kat. Four of the five suspects are either involved in other relationships or are such a character type as to not even consider touching, let alone sleeping with, an old trout like Kat. Yet, in keeping with the fish analogy, I can see why a few were logical red herrings. However, were the secret shagger anyone other than Derek, the lives of several characters would be affected.
Even though I puked at the thought of this whodunnit, because it seemed to want the audience to root for a smelly, old trollop to cheat on her faithful husband, in connivance with this anti-male version of EastEnders, what I enjoy about whodunnits is the exposure it gives to viewers who wouldn't recognise critical thinking it the concept slapped them in the face with a rotten wet fish.
Derek is the shagger.
It was alway only ever going to be Derek.
Think logically.
Affair storylines are usually used as a means by which one character departs a series. A couple splits and one leaves - otherwise, you have the interminable kabuki theatre of a will-they-won't-they return. Until Diederick Santer unwisely broke the mould of splitting couples so one could leave with Stax, this was the norm.
Common sense and long years of watching soaps would tell me that Shaggergate would mean the ultimate humiliation and departure of Kat. The character hasn't worked at all since her return - due, primarily, to pisspoor writing, but also to the fact that the actress hasn't quite got enough of a grip this time on a character she invented, and her excessive use of botox didn't aid in her performance.
However, since EastEnders made Kat, and EastEnders destroyed her for no real reason other than the then-producer's whim, I think TPTB are going to give it one last go at repairing her character; and since Shane Richie has repeatedly said that Kat was meant to be with Alfie or with no one, I think it's safe to surmise that somehow they intend, at least, to try to repair the damage to the couple.
I have always believed that this storyline was only ever meant to implode upon as few characters as possible - namely, Alfie and Kat. Four of the five suspects are either involved in other relationships or are such a character type as to not even consider touching, let alone sleeping with, an old trout like Kat. Yet, in keeping with the fish analogy, I can see why a few were logical red herrings. However, were the secret shagger anyone other than Derek, the lives of several characters would be affected.
- Ray: In a relationship with Kim and employed by Alfie as a chef at the Vic. The only reason I sorta kinda wanted it to be Ray was the joy at watching Kim smack the living shit (and botox) out of Kat's foul face. And Kim can pack a punch. Not only would that have scotched their relationship, plus the faux and phony friendship Kat and Kim have, it would also have marked Ray as a creep, who wouldn't be above doing the dirty on someone who'd given him a job off the street. Besides, TPTB had such obvious innuendo between Kat and Ray that the numpties on DS and Walford creche were screaming that it had to be Ray.
- Max: Again, a red herring as Tanya is leaving shortly. Yes, Max is having women problems, and, yes, Tanya will leave him when he's caught out. But Max knocked back Roxy, and Roxy is miles above Kat in class and cleanliness. Max simply wouldn't go there. The shaggaflat was too obvious a hint as well - not to mention Max's oblique reference to money problems and asking for the address of a flat from Derek. Max's women problems, I surmise, lead back to the lost months he spent with Derek in Manchester; and it wouldn't surprise me if Max were married. Max is not the shagger.
- Jack: Disabuse yourself of any "touching" notion that Jack and Kat are bonding over Tommy. That's the biggest load of bullshit going. Tommy is not James, and Tommy is alive. Before the football storyline, Jack had drunk in the Vic for donkey's days and not given one glace Kat's way. Besides, he's sniffing around Sharon at the moment.
- Michael: Another red herring, planted at the time of Janine's wedding, when Kat fabricated a drunken one-night-stand into a full-fledged love affair. Plus, Janine is leaving - easy to reckon that she runs away from yet another Slater nabbing her man. As if. Janine would stay and fight. The fact that a lot of screen time is being built around Janine's PND paranoia about Michael having an affair and tying in with her trust issues in general only means that EastEnders is emphasizing this for Janine reasons only and nothing to do with the Shagger storyline. Michael is not the man.
- Derek: Derek has the least to lose in this. He's not married, and it's been ages since he's had any sort of sustainable sexual relationship. His last foray was with Rainie Fox, and if Roxy is miles above Katshit, Rainie is just below her, so we know Derek isn't choosy. He also has questionable taste and might find a woman who dresses like she belongs in a lower-end brothel attractive. He would rent a flat for a tryst, and he's be, oddly, cornily romantic enough to send flowers and write a declaration of his love on a bandage in lipstick. Derek is old-fashioned and probably a romantic at heart. Also, Derek has an axe to grind with Alfie after Alfie scammed him earlier in the year; and if the whole affair went tits up, he'd be cheek enough to tell Alfie he'd done him a favour.
Finally, as I said, since affair storylines usually end with someone's departure, and it's getting pretty obvious that, unfortunately for the time being Ms Wallace isn't going anywhere, I'd say having Derek as the secret Shagger is one of pointers to a possible Derek departure at Christmas. Also, I think Lorraine Newman realised how deeply unpopular this storyline is, which is why she's calling time on it now and making the Shagger the most unattractive suspect possible. At the end of the day, she's made this storyline the beginning of Kat's redemption (cough cough), so I suppose that's something positive.
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